Tina Fey nel ruolo di...
Liz Lemon
- Liz Lemon: Ew, Julia Roberts in a movie about eating? Give me Kirstie Alley or somebody who knows what she's doing!
- Jack Donaghy: Meanwhile, I just got worked over by my Trinidadian night nurse. I made every mistake you can in a negotiation: I spoke first, I smiled, I negotiated with myself. If I had done that in a mock negotiation in business school, Professor Widmer would have spanked me in front of the whole class - bare bottom!
- Liz Lemon: OK, but it's harder with someone like a nanny, right? I mean, there's an emotional component: she takes care of your baby.
- Jack Donaghy: Lemon, you just had a structural, analytic insight. Professor Widmer would have given you a "Good Job" spanking!
- Liz Lemon: What IS business school?
- Jenna Maroney: Hang on. Why do you have a cat? And a fanny pack? And your ponytail, it's being held up by a chip clip.
- Liz Lemon: Because I'm giving up, Jenna. I did the math. How many times does a woman meet Mr. Right? I've had three chances: Floyd, then Carol, and I was once in an elevator with Tom Brokaw. And I blew all three... Opportunities!
- Jack Donaghy: Lemon, a word. Hang on. Recent breakup, fanny pack, cat? Quick. Who is the lead character on NCIS?
- Liz Lemon: Special Agent Jethro Gibbs.
- Jack Donaghy: In your office, now.
- Liz Lemon: There's only one question I can't answer. Who was Anders? An old Harvard chum of Toofer's? The son of one of Jack's senator friends?
- Jack Donaghy: He certainly wasn't a Swiss prostitute that Martha Stewart recommended to me.
- Liz Lemon: And that is the complex explanation. Of course, such a conspiracy would require a group of people who knew me so well and cared about my happiness so much that it's impossible to believe. No one could ever be that lucky. Which is why I choose the simple explanation. I choose to believe that last night Liz Lemon went out, got some, and felt good about it. And so I say good-bye to spinsterhood.
- [She opens her cat's cage]
- Liz Lemon: Good-bye to giving up and to... Oh, God, a hawk got her! Emily Dickinson!