- Mark Desmond: The Star of Bialya. Now, that will buy a lot of chemistry sets.
- Batman: Sorry, Desmond. I'm giving you detention.
- Mark Desmond: [childishly] Where's my mommy? The scary man is hurting me.
- [murmuring from the crowd]
- Batman: [putting him down] You may have fooled these citizens, Desmond, but I've had my eye on you since you pilfered those chemicals from S.T.A.R. Labs.
- Mark Desmond: Those chemicals will give me the brawn to match my brain. And what better time than now to finally test them out?
- Batman: No, Desmond! You don't know the side effects.
- [drinking from a vial, he grows in size]
- Blockbuster: Now Blockbuster is strongest.
- [getting hit with a batarang]
- Blockbuster: And Blockbuster no like Bathead.
- [punching Batman, he knocks over a display case]
- Blockbuster: Ooh, pretty sparkly rock.
- Green Arrow: What's gotten into you, Bats? You nearly hit Guy. I know he's a jerk, but...
- Batman: You still don't get it, Arrow.
- [nudging Arrow's car with the Batmobile]
- Green Arrow: [seeing he's about to crash] No!
- Batman: When it comes to protecting Gotham, I have no friends.
- Joker: Ooh, Plastic Man stretches into an early lead. But Steppenwolf's war machine is hot on his tail.
- Blockbuster: [fighting Batman] Me crush you.
- Billy Batson: Leave him alone, you big bully!
- Blockbuster: Huh? Puny Billy Batson?
- [grabbing Billy in his hand]
- Blockbuster: Any last words, kids?
- Billy Batson: Just one. Shazam!
- Blockbuster: Huh? Where kid go?
- Captain Marvel: Hmm. I'll look into that. Right after I do this.
- [throwing punches]
- Woozy Winks: Really sorry about Batman, Mr. Arrow.
- Plastic Man: Yeah, he's the last guy I would've thunk would crack under pressure, but...
- Green Arrow: Forget Bats. We have work to do.
- Green Arrow: [Catwoman's car is knocked off course] Batman, we can't just let her...
- Batman: No one's stopping you from saving her.
- Woozy Winks: [Plastic Man is knocked off course] Plas! Plas, wake up! We're gonna hit, and one of us don't bounce!
- Woozy Winks: You okay, Mr. Gardner?
- Guy Gardner: Ah, shut it, snoozy. I'm getting us out of here.
- [realizing his powers aren't working]
- Guy Gardner: My ring!
- Plastic Man: [tapping him on the shoulder] Uh, Guy?
- [indicating the ring in a glass case out of reach]
- Guy Gardner: Earth's doomed.
- Batman: [taking down Blockbuster] NIce work, Captain Marvel.
- Captain Marvel: You, too, Batman. I've always wanted to work wi...
- [seeing the museum displays]
- Captain Marvel: Holy moly, the triceratops! Sorry, Batman, I-I don't wanna miss the dinosaurs.
- Joker: [deploying a giant whoopie cushion from the Jokermobile] Sorry, Manta, but he who smelt it, dealt it.
- Green Arrow: [breaking free of their containment] Now, hustle. We don't have much time. Move it, team!
- Joker: [he and the other villains are still imprisoned] Yoo-hoo! Hero boys! Forget someone?
- Green Arrow, Plastic Man, Guy Gardner, Woozy Winks: No!
- Plastic Man: Wait, you mean you and Batman never raced in Monte Carlo?
- Green Arrow: Well, we did bust the Clock King there. Batman kept the bad guy busy while I destroyed his Tick Tock Terror.
- Plastic Man: So when Batman confronted you before the race...?
- Green Arrow: He was tipping me off to the plan.
- Guy Gardner: And you were in on it, too?
- Huntress: Maybe.
- Joker: So, who wants to go out for pizza? My treat.
- Green Arrow: This doohickey generates an electromagnetic pulse that'll carve a hole in the cell's force field, but only for a split second. Just enough time to get one arrow through.
- Guy Gardner: But you don't have any arrows.
- [Arrow smirks]
- Mongul: Now that the course is complete, and the racers have arrived, let the games begin. So says Mongul!
- Guy Gardner: Oh, you wanna play games?
- [conjuring a mallet, he moves to strike]
- Batman: Stand down, Guy.
- Mongul: I can order Warmoon to obliterate the Earth with a thought.
- [grumbling, Guy stands down]
- Mongul: Then welcome to Death Race. One hundred treacherous miles across this desert. The rules are simple. Rule one: If my champion Steppenwolf wins, then Warmoon will destroy the entire planet. Otherwise, the winner becomes ruler of Earth, to play with it as he, or she, sees fit.
- Joker: [laughing gleefully] Imagine what fun that would be.
- Mongul: Rule two: anyone knocked out of the race will be teleported directly to Warmoon, where they can catch the end of the competition from a holding cell and await execution. Rule three: there are no other rules.
- Green Arrow: What if we don't wanna play?
- Mongul: Ah, that is your prerogative. But I will instantly destroy the home city of anyone who refuses to race. No quitters? Ah, splendid. Now, prepare your vehicles.
- Green Arrow: So, what's the plan, Bats?
- Batman: My plan is to win. Losing would mean Gotham falls. Not on my watch.
- Green Arrow: Hey, look, I feel the same way about Star City, but...
- Batman: But nothing. I'm winning this race. The same way I won in Monte Carlo last year.
- Green Arrow: Oh, please. You only won in Monte Carlo because I let you win.
- Batman: [grabbing him, with a threatening fist raised] There's only one way to prove that, isn't there?
- Mongul: [separating them with a laser blast] Now, now. Save your anger for the race.
- Batman: See you at the finish line.
- Huntress: So this is how it's gonna be? And I used to think you were hot.
- Joker: That Green Gardner fellow is aces. But superheroing takes an awful lot of concentration. Sure hope nothing distracts him.
- [he deploys a jack-in-the-box]
- Guy Gardner: [screaming as the jack pops out] Ahhh! Clowns!
- Joker: Four racers remain. So why is everyone picking on poor little me? Perhaps this will help lighten them up a bit?
- [he deploys a laughing fish into the Batmobile's windshield, and acid that eats through the wheels of Huntress' motorcycle]
- Huntress: If I'm going down, I'm taking you with me, Joker.
- [she blows out a tire with her crossbow; as he ejects, a "boing" is heard]
- Joker: [soaring into the air with springs on his feet] Best Death Race ever!
- Mongul: [after Huntress crashes] Too bad. She was quite fetching. Still, what's a Death Race without a little death?
- Mongul: Bravo, and brava. You ran a magnificent race. Ruthless and cunning. All that I could have asked. And you certainly humiliated my champion.
- [blasting Steppenwolf]
- Mongul: My ex-champion, that is. Unfortunately, I really have no use for a troublesome hero-laden world such as Earth. So I'm still gonna blow it up.
- Batman: But you promised.
- Mongul: Word to the wise: never trust someone who was a Warmoon.
- Batman: Actually, I didn't.
- Mongul: [the satellite blows up] My... my Warmoon!
- Green Arrow: Go on, Mongul. You know you wanna say it. "Curses, foiled again."
- Mongul: Very clever, humans. Just for that, I will destroy all of you before I go!
- Batman: Wrong again, Mongul.
- [converting the Batmobile into a super-suit and getting the best of Mongul]
- Batman: The only place you're going is a small cell on Oa.
- Guy Gardner: Ha, one punch. What a mook.