Batman: The Brave and the Bold (TV Series)

Death Race to Oblivion! (2009)

Jeff Bennett: Joker, Captain Marvel

Quotes 

• Joker : Uh-oh. Looks like Manta is making a crab for the lead. Batman doesn't have a ghost of a chance.

  [cackling as Black Manta and Gentleman Ghost team up on the Batmobile] 

  Joker : End of the road, Batsy!

• Joker : Hey, there, sports fans. Looks like Catwoman's trying to thin the competition, too.

• Joker : Ooh, Plastic Man stretches into an early lead. But Steppenwolf's war machine is hot on his tail.

• Blockbuster : [fighting Batman]  Me crush you.

  Billy Batson : Leave him alone, you big bully!

  Blockbuster : Huh? Puny Billy Batson?

  [grabbing Billy in his hand] 

  Blockbuster : Any last words, kids?

  Billy Batson : Just one. Shazam!

  Blockbuster : Huh? Where kid go?

  Captain Marvel : Hmm. I'll look into that. Right after I do this.

  [throwing punches] 

• Batman : [taking down Blockbuster]  NIce work, Captain Marvel.

  Captain Marvel : You, too, Batman. I've always wanted to work wi...

  [seeing the museum displays] 

  Captain Marvel : Holy moly, the triceratops! Sorry, Batman, I-I don't wanna miss the dinosaurs.

• Joker : [deploying a giant whoopie cushion from the Jokermobile]  Sorry, Manta, but he who smelt it, dealt it.

• Green Arrow : [breaking free of their containment]  Now, hustle. We don't have much time. Move it, team!

  Joker : [he and the other villains are still imprisoned]  Yoo-hoo! Hero boys! Forget someone?

  Green Arrow , Plastic Man , Guy Gardner , Woozy Winks : No!

• Plastic Man : Wait, you mean you and Batman never raced in Monte Carlo?

  Green Arrow : Well, we did bust the Clock King there. Batman kept the bad guy busy while I destroyed his Tick Tock Terror.

  Plastic Man : So when Batman confronted you before the race...?

  Green Arrow : He was tipping me off to the plan.

  Guy Gardner : And you were in on it, too?

  Huntress : Maybe.

  Joker : So, who wants to go out for pizza? My treat.

• Mongul : Now that the course is complete, and the racers have arrived, let the games begin. So says Mongul!

  Guy Gardner : Oh, you wanna play games?

  [conjuring a mallet, he moves to strike] 

  Batman : Stand down, Guy.

  Mongul : I can order Warmoon to obliterate the Earth with a thought.

  [grumbling, Guy stands down] 

  Mongul : Then welcome to Death Race. One hundred treacherous miles across this desert. The rules are simple. Rule one: If my champion Steppenwolf wins, then Warmoon will destroy the entire planet. Otherwise, the winner becomes ruler of Earth, to play with it as he, or she, sees fit.

  Joker : [laughing gleefully]  Imagine what fun that would be.

  Mongul : Rule two: anyone knocked out of the race will be teleported directly to Warmoon, where they can catch the end of the competition from a holding cell and await execution. Rule three: there are no other rules.

  Green Arrow : What if we don't wanna play?

  Mongul : Ah, that is your prerogative. But I will instantly destroy the home city of anyone who refuses to race. No quitters? Ah, splendid. Now, prepare your vehicles.

• Joker : [starting Mongul's race]  And we're off! Well, I'm always a little off, but you get the idea.

• Joker : That Green Gardner fellow is aces. But superheroing takes an awful lot of concentration. Sure hope nothing distracts him.

  [he deploys a jack-in-the-box] 

  Guy Gardner : [screaming as the jack pops out]  Ahhh! Clowns!

• Joker : Four racers remain. So why is everyone picking on poor little me? Perhaps this will help lighten them up a bit?

  [he deploys a laughing fish into the Batmobile's windshield, and acid that eats through the wheels of Huntress' motorcycle] 

  Huntress : If I'm going down, I'm taking you with me, Joker.

  [she blows out a tire with her crossbow; as he ejects, a "boing" is heard] 

  Joker : [soaring into the air with springs on his feet]  Best Death Race ever!