- Mary Shannon: Why do you always side with him?
- Eleanor Prince: Because his decisions aren't predicated upon flapjack availability.
- Mary Shannon: I see that as a weakness.
- Marshall Mann: Eve walks around the garden of Eden, happy as can be, not even thinking about apples, then one day God says, "Oh, by the way, everything here is for you: enjoy, frolic, eat, but whatever you do, stay away from the apples." Next thing you know, all Eve can think about is those juicy red apples. Which leads me to believe even God didn't understand women.
- Marshall Mann: Did you know periwinkle is also the name of an intertidal mollusk?
- Mary Shannon: No, but if you hum a few bars I'll try to fake it.
- Olivia Moreno: [Mary learns Olivia is dating Cesar Calderon] I haven't said anything about anything to do with my dad to anyone. And Cesar hasn't asked.
- Mary Shannon: [skeptically] Really?
- Olivia Moreno: I swear to God, Mary, Cesar's legit. He's a producer.
- Mary Shannon: Oh, a producer!
- Olivia Moreno: Yeah.
- Mary Shannon: Why didn't you say so? TV? Movies?
- Cesar Calderon: Music.
- Mary Shannon: Oh.
- Olivia Moreno: Look, Cesar's only been in the business two years, and he already has a gold record.
- Mary Shannon: Yeah. Why am I picturing a severed horse head between the sheets?
- [Marshall laughs]
- Mary Shannon: I never got over the hurt of my father leaving me, and I don't ever want to go through that again. But I am not afraid of commitment. It's just that with the possible exception of Marshall, I seem to be the only person on the planet who... who believes you honor your commitments, no matter what, and that you don't break a promise because keeping it has become inconvenient. And you don't commit yourself to something as important as marriage because you got called up to the majors.
- Raphael Ramirez: Well, you won't have to worry about that anymore.
- Mary Shannon: Why? What are you talking about?
- Raphael Ramirez: I retired.
- Mary Shannon: What?
- Raphael Ramirez: Yesterday.
- Mary Shannon: What, you just woke up and decided to quit?
- Raphael Ramirez: No. No, no. Look, it's not like that. I... I decided last year, after I hurt my knee, to give it six months and see how I come back. Then I hurt my hand. So I pushed it another three months. This decision has been almost a year in the making. Now it's time for me to get on with the next part of my life. And for the record, I bought the ring six months before I asked you to marry me. You are the most difficult woman in the world, but I have known for a long time that I want to spend the rest of my life with you.