Shared with you
- Amanda Waller: You know what the problem with a metahuman is? The human part. We got lucky with Superman. He shared our values. The next Superman might not.
- The Joker: Would you die for me?
- Harley Quinn: Yes.
- The Joker: That's too easy. Would you live for me?
- Amanda Waller: [narration] Before she ran off and joined the circus, she was known as Dr. Harleen Quinzel. A psychiatrist at Arkham Asylum. She was assigned to The Clown himself.
- The Joker: Dr. Quinzel. You know, I live for these moments with you. What do you got?
- Harley Quinn: I got you a kitty.
- The Joker: So thoughtful.
- Amanda Waller: [narration] She thought she was curing him, but she was falling in love.
- The Joker: There is something you could do for me, Doctor.
- Harley Quinn: Anything. I mean, yeah.
- The Joker: I need a machine gun
- Harley Quinn: A machine gun?
- Amanda Waller: [narration] Talk about a workplace romance gone wrong.
- Harley Quinn: Huh? What was that? I should kill everyone and escape?
- [to SEALs]
- Harley Quinn: Sorry. The voices.
- [chuckles]
- Harley Quinn: I'm kidding! Jeez! That's not what they really said.
- Harley Quinn: [at a bar] Whatcha having, K.C.?
- Deadshot: Bloody Mary, right?
- Killer Croc: Drink dulls the mind.
- Harley Quinn: K.C., it's the end of the world. Have a drink with us.
- Killer Croc: Beer.
- Captain Boomerang: There he is. Give the man a beer.
- Harley Quinn: How about you, hot stuff?
- Diablo: Water.
- Harley Quinn: That's a good idea, honey.
- [pours water]
- Harley Quinn: Ninja? You want some sake?
- Katana: Whiskey.
- Harley Quinn: Whiskey.
- Deadshot: [points to shot glass] What am I, 12?
- Captain Boomerang: [regarding Katana] Hey, well, you know what they say about the crazy ones.
- Harley Quinn: Huh?
- [Harley smashes a shop window]
- Rick Flag: Seriously? The hell's wrong with you people?
- Harley Quinn: [takes a purse] We're bad guys. It's what we do.
- Rick Flag: You disobey me, you die.
- [Killer Croc growls]
- Rick Flag: You try to escape, you die. You otherwise irritate or vex me... and guess what? You die.
- Harley Quinn: I'm known to be quite vexing. I'm just forewarning you.
- Rick Flag: Lady, shut up!
- The Joker: What do we have here?
- Dr. Harleen Quinzel: I did everything you said. I helped you.
- The Joker: Ah. You helped me. By erasing my mind? What few faded memories I had! No. You left me in a black hole of rage and confusion. Is that the medicine you practice, Dr. Quinzel?
- Dr. Harleen Quinzel: What are you gonna do? You gonna kill me, Mr. J?
- The Joker: What? Oh, I'm not gonna kill ya. I'm just gonna hurt ya... really, really bad.
- Dr. Harleen Quinzel: You think so? Well, I can take it.
- The Joker: [puts belt in her mouth] I wouldn't want you to break those perfect porcelain-capped teeth when the juice hits your brain.
- Amanda Waller: [naration] They became the king and queen of Gotham City. And God help anyone who disrespected the queen.
- Amanda Waller: [narrating] And that was just the beginning.
- [Joker and Harley drive crazily through Gotham City when Batman starts to follow]
- Harley Quinn: Come on, Puddin'. Do it!
- The Joker: Oh. We have got company.
- Harley Quinn: Batsy, Batsy, Batsy.
- Amanda Waller: [narrating] She's crazier than him. And more fearless.
- [Batman leaps onto the roof of the car]
- Harley Quinn: Stupid Bats, you're ruining date night!
- [Harley attempts to shoot Batman through the roof]
- Deadshot: [toasting] Here's to honor... among thieves.
- Katana: I'm not a thief.
- Deadshot: Oh. She's not a thief.
- [they clink their glasses]
- Captain Boomerang: I actually prefer to think of myself as an asset relocation specialist.
- Deadshot: Well, we almost pulled it off... despite what everybody thought.
- Diablo: We weren't picked to succeed. You know that, right? We were all chosen to fail.
- Deadshot: Yeah, I know that. Worst part of it is, they're going to blame us for the whole thing. And they can't have people knowing the truth. We're the patsies. The cover up. Don't forget... we're the bad guys.
- Griggs: Ames, if this man shoots me, I want you to kill him... and I want you to go clear my browser history.
- The Joker: I love this guy. He's so intense!
- Monster T: [looking at Harley dancing] Mmm. You're a lucky man. You got a bad bitch.
- The Joker: Oh, that she is. The fire in my loins. The itch in my crotch. The one, the only, the infamous Harley Quinn!
- [whistles for Harley]
- The Joker: Ooh, come to Daddy.
- Harley Quinn: Puddin'!
- [laughs]
- The Joker: Listen, you are my gift to this handsome hunka hunka! You belong to him now.
- Harley Quinn: Well...
- [barks at Monster T and laughs]
- Harley Quinn: You're cute. You want me? I'm all yours.
- Monster T: I don't want no beef.
- The Joker: You don't want no beef?
- [mocking]
- The Joker: You don't want no beef? You don't want no beef?
- Harley Quinn: Why, what's wrong? You don't like me? Fine. Don't waste my time then.
- Monster T: This is your lady.
- The Joker: Look, are you enjoying yourself?
- The Joker: No. That's your lady, Joker.
- The Joker: That's right.
- Diablo: Don't touch me, man!
- Deadshot: Don't touch you? What you gonna do?
- Diablo: Don't touch me!
- Deadshot: I'm touching you. I'm touching you. Do something.
- Diablo: Don't touch me!
- Deadshot: Do something!
- Diablo: You wanna see something?
- Deadshot: Oh, yeah, I wanna see...
- Diablo: You wanna see something?
- Deadshot: Yes, I wanna see something!
- [Diablo goes berserk and shoots fire everywhere then turns and stares a Deadshot]
- Diablo: I was trying to get you there. Phil Jackson. We good, right?
- Deadshot: [Harley points gun] Whoa! Relax. It's me.
- Harley Quinn: [long pause] You ever been in love?
- Deadshot: Nah. Never.
- Harley Quinn: Bullshit.
- Deadshot: You don't kill as many people as I've killed and still sleep like a kitten if you feel shit like love.
- Harley Quinn: Another textbook sociopath.
- Seals' Admiral Burns: These are villains, Amanda. What makes you think you can control them?
- Amanda Waller: Because getting people to act against their own self-interest for the national security of the United States is what I do for a living.
- Griggs: Stay back. If she moves, fire her up, all right?
- [to Harley]
- Griggs: You gonna come down from there or what?
- [Harley laughs and swings slowly down to the floor]
- Griggs: Oh yeah, look at you.
- [Harley lands and goes to the front of her cell]
- Griggs: You know the rules, hotness. You gotta keep off of these bars.
- Harley Quinn: What, these bars?
- Griggs: Yeah. Those bars.
- [Harley licks the bar]
- Griggs: Oh, my God. You are really in bad shape upstairs, lady!
- Harley Quinn: Gonna come in here and tell me that? Or are you too scared? Come on, I'm bored. I'm bored. Play with me.
- Griggs: You put five of my guards in the hospital, honey. No one's gonna play with you. You sleep on the ground.
- Harley Quinn: I sleep where I want, when I want, with who I want.
- Griggs: Oh man. I love you.
- [on radio]
- Griggs: Alpha One, hit her.
- Harley Quinn: You got all dressed up for me?
- The Joker: Oh, you know I'd do anything for you. By the way, I've got some grape soda on ice and a bear skin rug waiting.
- Harley Quinn: Yeah?
- Frost: Boss, we got a problem!
- [the Joker's helicopter is struck by a missile]
- The Joker: Huh? This bird... is baked. Okay honey, it's me and you.
- Harley Quinn: Let's do it!
- Deadshot: I don't like this, Flag.
- Rick Flag: I don't like it either.
- [Deadshot puts on his mask]
- Harley Quinn: Pussy.
- Deadshot: I will knock your ass out. I do not care that you're a girl.
- [Enchantress touches Admiral Burns]
- Seals' Admiral Burns: [unnerved] Uh, please don't touch me. Please don't touch me.
- Deadshot: [given a gun] Y'all jokers must be crazy.
- [proceeds to put several headshots through several targets]
- Amanda Waller: his is crown jewels here, Mr. Wayne. And you do understand my legal exposure. If anyone knew what I procured for you...
- Bruce Wayne: Listen... I can keep a secret, okay? What do you want?
- Amanda Waller: People are asking questions about Midway City. The kind of people who can get the answers. And if they can get those answers, my head will be on a pike.
- Bruce Wayne: Consider yourself under my protection. If you deliver.
- Amanda Waller: [hands him several files regarding metahumans] Why, Mr. Wayne?
- Bruce Wayne: Just like to make friends.
- Amanda Waller: There's the difference between us. You believe in friendship, I believe in leverage.
- Bruce Wayne: Good night.
- Amanda Waller: You look tired. You should stop working nights.
- Bruce Wayne: You should shut it down, or my friends and I will do it for you.
- Monster T: We finally meet.
- Frost: Nah, he don't shake hands. But sit down and have a drink.
- Monster T: Hey, J. On behalf of everybody, welcome back. I wanted to come by and personally say thank you. You making me good money. I'm making you good money.
- The Joker: Are you sweet talking me?
- [laughs]
- The Joker: I love this guy. He's so intense!
- The Joker: Question... Would you die for me?
- Harley Quinn: Yes.
- The Joker: That's too easy. Would you... Would you live for me? Hmm?
- Harley Quinn: Yes.
- The Joker: Careful. Do not say this oath thoughtlessly. Desire becomes surrender. Surrender becomes power.
- [pause]
- The Joker: Do you want this?
- Harley Quinn: I do.
- The Joker: Say it.
- [pauses]
- The Joker: Say it. Say it. Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty...
- Harley Quinn: Please?
- The Joker: [impressed] Aw! God, you're so... good.
- Dexter Tolliver: What if Superman had decided to fly down, rip off the roof of the White House and grab the President of the United States right out of the Oval Office? Who would've stopped him?
- Harley Quinn: I lost my Puddin'. But you can get him back, right?
- Enchantress: I can, my dear. Anything you want.
- Harley Quinn: You promise?
- Enchantress: Yes, child. You need only bow and serve beneath my feet.
- Harley Quinn: I like what you're sellin', lady. There's just one teeny problem. You messed with my friends!
- Amanda Waller: Deadshot... shoot that woman right now!
- Deadshot: She ain't do shit to me.
- Amanda Waller: You're a hitman, right? I got a contract. Kill Harley Quinn. Do it for your freedom and your kid.
- Deadshot: [pause] Now she dead.
- [Sees that Joker is about to drive through the railing, into the river]
- Harley Quinn: Puddin'.
- [Hysterically panicking as the car goes into to the water]
- Harley Quinn: Puddin', I can't swim!
- Harley Quinn: [seeing Enchantress building her weapon] Hey, everyone can see all this trippy magic stuff, right?
- Rick Flag: Yeah. Why?
- Harley Quinn: I'm off my meds.
- Deadshot: I don't know if they told you, but I-I'm a hitman. I'm not a fireman. I don't save people.
- Captain Boomerang: [to Diablo] And the kids?
- Harley Quinn: He killed them. Didn't you?
- [pause]
- Harley Quinn: Own that shit. Own it! What'd you think was gonna happen? Huh?
- Deadshot: Hey, Harley. Come on.
- Harley Quinn: What, you were just... Thinking you can have a happy family and coach little leagues, and make car payments? Normal's a setting on the dryer. People like us, we don't get normal!
- Captain Boomerang: [yelling] Why is it always a knife fight every single time you open your mouth? You know, outside you're amazing. But inside, you're ugly.
- Harley Quinn: We all are. We all are! Except for him.
- [looks at Killer Croc]
- Harley Quinn: He's ugly on the outside, too.
- Killer Croc: Not me, shorty. I'm beautiful.
- Harley Quinn: Yeah, you are.