Day Shift (2022)

Dave Franco: Seth

Photos 

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Quotes 

• Seth : Guess what?

  Bud Jablonski : What's that?

  Seth : I didn't pee myself this time.

  Bud Jablonski : Get out.

  Heather : Vampires don't pee or poop.

  Bud Jablonski : Nah, they don't.

  Seth : Please just let me have this little victory.

• Seth : Carol? Carol did you eat my yogurt again? I even wrote my name on the lid today, so you literally had to peel back my name to get to the yogurt. What? You can't hear me? I'm gonna fart in my yogurt tomorrow and you're gonna eat my fart. Next.

• Bud Jablonski : [holding a jar of yellow liquid]  You gotta get some of this too. I'm sure you know this, Mr. Union Man. But when vamps are killed, they release a gas that gets on you that other vamps can sniff out in a second. So you gotta get all of that off. Here, take this. It's my special blend like a little, uh, skunk musk, okay? Now, get that on you, in the shower.

  Seth : Oh, Jesus.

  Bud Jablonski : On every inch of you, okay? Be extremely careful. Don't get it in your eyes. And whatever you do... Don't get it in your butthole.

  Seth : What happens in the butthole?

  Seth : I mean, it can't kill you, but... Jesus Christ.

• Bud Jablonski : You okay?

  Seth : I don't know. I just keep thinking about how all those vampires we just killed used to be regular people.

  Bud Jablonski : There you go. The old vampires-are-just-like-us routine. But they're not, Seth. You know what I see when I see a vamp? Big old dollar signs. Cause all they are is murderers and liars. It ain't Brad Pitt in a leather jacket and some blood raves. It's not Eclipse. It's not New Moon. It's not Breaking Dawn Part One. It ain't like that all right?

  Seth : Why do you know the names to all the specific Twilight films? And what's your gripe with Breaking Dawn Part 2? It's the exciting conclusion of the whole Twilight saga. Wha... have you seen Part 2? Bella has her baby now. It's insane.

  Bud Jablonski : She had the baby?

  Seth : Oh I wish I was you! Just to experience that for the first time. You are in for a treat.

• Seth : Can I offer some advice?

  Bud Jablonski : No.

• Bud Jablonski : Feeling better?

  Seth : Not really. I got some of that yellow stuff in my butthole. It was so much worse than what you even described.

  Bud Jablonski : Bet it was.