Plot

Butters starts hanging out with the Vampire kids, who are angering the Goth kids at South Park Elementary because everybody is confusing the Vampire kids with them.

Butters becomes concerned when he notices that more and more kids at South Park Elementary School are dressing in black and drinking blood. He fears that the students are all turning into vampires, but when he tries to warn Stan, Kyle, Eric, and Kenny while they're playing war games on their computers during math class, they ignore him. When he tries to alert his parents, his father is more concerned that the food items in the pantry have not been placed in alphabetical order, resulting in him getting Hamburger Helper in his milk. Tired of being ignored by his friends and grounded by his parents, Butters decides to join the ranks of the vampires in order to become fearsome and ungroundable.

Butters contacts the leader of the vampires, fifth-grader Mike McKowsky (who now calls himself Vampeer), and requests to be turned. At first, the vampires are reluctant but, after Butters brings them a case of Dr Pepper and some cherry Twizzlers, they relent and initiate him into the group. Then, they take him to the newly-opened Hot Topic clothing store in the South Park mall and outfit him in proper vampire garb. When they make him drink a bowl of Clamato juice "blood", however, Butters begins to fear that he's made an unwise decision to become a vampire because "blood" tastes awful, like clams and tomato juice. Getting hungrier, he sneaks into Cartman's bedroom and tries to drink Eric's blood but winds up only slobbering on his neck, giving him a hickey, and having his sexual identity challenged.

Meanwhile, the original four Goth kids have also begun to notice the sudden spate of vampire kids at the school, and they are tired of being mistaken for vampires. Goths are NOT vampires, they maintain, but nobody listens. They try to return to dressing in their old Gap clothes but, when they're simply referred to as "the fat girl, the big-nosed kid, the midget, and the guy with pock marks on his face," they realize that more drastic measures are called for. Remembering that the way to get rid of vampires in traditional vampire lore is to get rid of the head vampire, they kidnap Mike McKowsky and Fed-Ex him to Scottsdale, Arizona. Unfortunately, the ranks of the vampire kids continues to increase.

Growing more and more hungry but unable to drink Clamato juice, Butters decides to help the Goth kids get rid of the vampires. He volunteers to show them where the kids are being transformed into vampires, reminding them of another legend that says, if the vampires' lair is destroyed, the vampires will go back to being human. Butters leads the Goths into Hot Topic, and the Goths proceed to burn down the store. After the burning, Butters goes home dressed in his old clothes. He informs his parents that he's no longer a vampire and that he can eat hot dogs again. His father informs him that there is Rice-a-Roni in his coffee and that Butters is grounded.

In the final scene, the Goth kids address the school body. "If you hate life, truly hate the sun, and need to smoke and drink coffee, you're Goth," says the kid with the pock marks on his face. "If, however, you like dressing in black because it's fun, enjoy putting sparkles on your cheeks and following the occult while avoiding things that are bad for your health, then you are most likely a douchebag vampire wannabee boner...because anyone that thinks they are a vampire is freaking retarded."