Psych (TV Series)

Lassie Did a Bad, Bad Thing (2009)

James Roday Rodriguez: Shawn Spencer

Photos 

Quotes 

• Burton 'Gus' Guster : I'm still not convinced, Shawn. How can you be absolutely certain that Lassiter didn't shoot Chavez?

  Shawn Spencer : It's relatively easy, Gus. I decided to be and therefore I am. Socrates said that.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : No, that was Decartes.

  Shawn Spencer : That was the cologne we wore in high school.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : That was Drakkar Noir.

  Shawn Spencer : No, that's a wine.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : That's pinot noir.

• Shawn Spencer : The spirit world is abuzz and my psychic vibes indicate - nay, INSIST that Lassiter did not shoot Chavez.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : I mean, we all knew that he would shoot somebody someday.

  Detective Ocampo : Oh, you think he's capable of it?

  Shawn Spencer : No, he doesn't. At most Lassiter would plant evidence.

• Shawn Spencer : You want to know my process?

  Carlton Lassiter : Yes.

  Shawn Spencer : Well, it starts with a "Holla", and ends with a Creamsicle. And if there's time in between...

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : Thundercats! Ho-oh!

• Shawn Spencer : Of course we'll help you. You're like our brother.

  [Gus winces] 

  Shawn Spencer : Stepbrother?

  [Gus winces again] 

  Shawn Spencer : Weird kid who lives down the street and eats nothing but mayo on Saltines?

• Shawn Spencer : Lassie, good news - we got you a grape one.

  Carlton Lassiter : Told you I don't want a Popsicle.

  Shawn Spencer : Ah, I guess we'll have to share this one.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : How do you share a Popsicle?

  Shawn Spencer : I take a lick, you take a lick, I take a lick, you take a lick, I take a lick.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : It's yours.

  Shawn Spencer : Sweet!

• Shawn Spencer : Don't you know cheese is best when it's aged? I read somewhere that a Japanese businessman spent a fortune on a 200-year-old wheel of Jarlesberg.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : I think you're confusing that with Monet's Water Lilies.

  Shawn Spencer : No, I'm pretty sure it was a Jarlesberg.

• Carlton Lassiter : I told you I didn't want a popsicle.

  Shawn Spencer : Oh, well I guess Gus and I will have to share this one.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : How do you share a popsicle?

  Shawn Spencer : Easy, I take a lick, you take a lick, I take a lick, you take a lick, I take a lick...

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : It's yours