Resident Alien (TV Series)
Pilot (2021)
Sara Tomko: Asta Twelvetrees
Photos
Quotes
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Harry Vanderspeigle : I have work to do.
Asta Twelvetrees : The autopsy's done. What work do you have to do at 8 o'clock at night?
Harry Vanderspeigle : [to himself] I strangled and drowned a guy four months ago, and I have to search the lake for his bloated corpse before some fisherman finds it.
[out loud]
Harry Vanderspeigle : Just stuff.
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Asta Twelvetrees : This is when you're supposed to ask me about my childhood.
Harry Vanderspeigle : Why? I don't care.
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Asta Twelvetrees : Wait, did you just call me a lizard?
Harry Vanderspeigle : No. I compared you to a lizard.
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Asta Twelvetrees : Feel free to come by... if you ever stop being a weirdo.
Harry Vanderspeigle : Weirdo? That's not good. Now, I have to meet her over there and prove to her that I fit in, that I'm normal, like them. But first, I'm going to cut Sam Hodges' brain out of his head and squish it in my hands.
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[Asta has just pulled Harry away from Sam's body while he was examining it in the middle of Sam's funeral]
Harry Vanderspeigle : I know how he died.
Asta Twelvetrees : What?
Harry Vanderspeigle : His windpipe; he needed air. It's the only thing that would explain what happened. He tried to give himself a tracheotomy. He couldn't do it in time.
Asta Twelvetrees : Yeah, that makes sense. But I don't get it. Why would his throat close up?
Harry Vanderspeigle : Because Sam Hodges was poisoned. And one of the people here is the murderer.
Harry Vanderspeigle : [both look dramatically at the mourners gathered around Sam's casket] Kung-kung!
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[Harry is at The 59 with Asta. D'Arcy is their bartender]
Harry Vanderspeigle : [looking at pick axe and shovel mounted on the wall] Why are the walls covered in old mining equipment?
D'Arcy Bloom : You are new, aren't you?
[shouting to other patrons]
D'Arcy Bloom : The 59!
Bar Patrons : [shouting back] The 59!
D'Arcy Bloom : Died to save one. Town motto. Maybe stick around long enough, and find out what it means.
[D'Arcy hands a shot of whiskey to Asta and Harry, raises her own shot]
D'Arcy Bloom : To the 59, and to finding the bastard that killed Sam.
Asta Twelvetrees : I'll drink to that.
[All three down their shots. Asta and D'Arcy wince appreciatively]
Harry Vanderspeigle : [Harry gasps and shudders] Wow. What is that?
D'Arcy Bloom : That's our local whiskey. Pretty great, huh?
Harry Vanderspeigle : No! It's awful.
[Asta laughs]
Harry Vanderspeigle : . Why do I want more?