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Chris O'Dowd in The IT Crowd (2006)

Quotes

Return of the Golden Child

The IT Crowd

Edit
  • Moss: I totally pimped your phone, girlfriend!
  • Moss: [returning from floor 7] Unbelievable. Some brainiac disabled his firewall which means that all of the computers on floor 7 are teeming with viruses, plus, I've just had to walk all the way down the motherfudging stairs because the lift is broken *again!*
  • Jen: [upset] Oh my God.
  • Roy: What?
  • Jen: Oh my God!
  • Roy: What, wha-what is it?
  • Jen: Denholm's dead!
  • Moss: Oh yes, and Denholm's dead!
  • Douglas: Ah! The IT-department. Run by a dynamic go-getter, a genius and a man from Ireland.
  • Jen: You brush your teeth in the bath?
  • Roy: Yeah, so?
  • Jen: Thats where your balls are.
  • [Douglas gets into scuffle with the priest]
  • Douglas: Unhand me, priest! Where is your God? Where is your God now?
  • Douglas: [Points to father's coffin] Here, lies a great man. A great man! FATHER!
  • Richmond: Richmond walks onto the scene in skull make-up.
  • Jen: Oh, no! You are not coming to the funeral, Richmond!
  • Richmond: What funeral?
  • [First lines; at his father's funeral]
  • Douglas: FATHEEEEEEEEEER!
  • Douglas: SPEAK, PRIEST!
  • Denholm Reynholm: [Denholm speaking via video-will at his funeral, in front of the entire company] There's one more thing, Douglas. But it's for your ears, only. So i want you to stop the tape, take it home, and watch it again later in private.
  • Douglas: But these are my new family, father. I hold no secrets from them.
  • Denholm Reynholm: Ok, Douglas now we're alone, I can speak frankly. You may well receive a visit from the police at some point concerning irregularities in the pension fund.
  • Douglas: Turn that off.
  • Denholm Reynholm: I've been using a very creative accountant, recently released from jail to manage what I call, a suck fund.
  • Douglas: Where's the remote?
  • Denholm Reynholm: Now a suck fund...
  • Douglas: [Ripping the DVD player from the TV] I'll do it myself. Goodbye, Father! Right. I'm off. I'll see you all on Monday,
  • Roy: Hello, IT. Have you tried turning it- you know what, I'm sick of saying that.

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