The Pizzagate Massacre (2020) Poster

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5/10
Disappointing
ReelReviewer91120 November 2021
Warning: Spoilers
Could and should have been so much more. Disappointed, to say the least.

Acting ok given the type of cheese this is but the story just doesn't deliver the goods.

Right when you're expecting the conspiracy to unfold ...it veers the other direction. Worth a one time watch.
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6/10
Needed a budget
TheOneThatYouWanted9 March 2022
I see what you did here. A nice little bait and switch to pi$$ off the pizza freaks out there. I can't blame you. But this film is too low budget to pull it off. However the lack of funds did not make it less entertaining. Still, it is not the type of film you can recommend in any occasion.
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6/10
The Acting really won me over- but the gratuitous gore is absurd.
hcharton-944-4757616 August 2022
The acting here is superb, especially by the leads. Photography is nice, and a number of the shots are composed excellently. Editing is well paced. Unfortunately too many of the precious budget dollars are used on absurd and over the top bloody gore. This takes away from the film instead of adding to it. The music is also quite poorly done. It's just a bunch of electronic noises. Next time, spend more energy on professional music and less on ketchup splattering. Screenplay is good but it needs to take a few more opportunities with the humor and absudity of the storyline. Surrealism will come across better with more laughs and less gore. Final note: I am watching this just a few hours after Alex Jones apologized for being "wrong, but not on purpose."
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2/10
Nice try...not gonna work...
Moviedude908 August 2022
This is a typical thing 'they' do-set up straw man arguments to avoid what really was a sick and twisted set of people, tweets, and emails involving very high up politicians. And they start the 'documentary' with "debunked conspiracy theory about slaves held in a series of pizza parlors." No, it was just one place, and one creepy ass owner, linked to very high up political players.

They try and add in a lot of absurd details, but the bottom line still applies-there's a lot of codewords in emails from famous people indicating a weird set of parties involving young children. Do your own research.
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3/10
unless...
ops-5253521 November 2021
Youre pro pizzagate activist or the direct opposite, it wont brace your dopamine induced laughing sensors a bit. Its a daft story about political activism in the one star state, a small cast black comedy rump that is hard to understand the further away from it you are on the gps.

Acting is archtypical, not so bad, but the story churns on idle, and the verbal acting becomes a bore in a short while, so if youre in for a average good laughable comedy, dont make a stop here. The grumpy old man have no witts nor the dark sense of humour needed to enjoy this film. A no recommend.
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2/10
BLAH!
pjkblue-3592628 April 2022
Hope it was a good payday for the cast and crew because the film was consistently mediocre.

Conspiracy theories aside, it was very thin and the storyline was helter-skelter as if it was all done with no content direction considered.

Reading about the low budget, you can see why the movie was rated so low. I'd rank it along with an old film called "Spider Baby".
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7/10
Not a bad movie
derptard2 August 2022
Warning: Spoilers
Obviously it's low budget. I expected it to be complete trash but it actually made me laugh a few times. The side character being a black woman named Karen, the main character's tattoo reveal, Phillip's sack. This guy may be the next Seth Rogan if he keeps making movies like this.
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3/10
You need to know why they make stuff like this
chrischanwasframed18 September 2022
I would be very surprised if this review gets posted but I'm going to try anyway. In my opinion, the global elite are a small group of highly intelligent amoral monsters with an absurd amount of.money and power, they then use this money and power to shape world events to their own benefit, often at the expense of all of the rest of us. Conspiracy theories often have some element of truth to them, events like the JFK assassination and 9/11 are strange and do provoke attention and investigation. Sometimes governments do lie, that is a fact, and so people have a right to question some of these events. Look up some documentaries about Pizzagate and you will see that there is no smoke without fire, eventually the public start to uncover the truth, and when this happens the people responsible will try to counter this by infiltrating the movement and controlling the opposition, they take what was a logical fact based theory about what has actually happened and why, and these bad actors then introduce lots of deliberately ridiculous ideas into the mix to try and discredit the movement as a whole and throw people off the scent, this film is a textbook example of that, they took a theory that makes a lot of sense (the global elite being involved in sex trafficking) and then introduce some crazy ideas about them being lizard people. Anyway, I just felt like ranting about that because that is exactly what this movie is trying to do, and people need to know that.

As far as the actual film goes, it's.very low quality in every way. It is a bad movie, it was always going to be, I wasn't expecting Citizen Kane, I just wanted something to watch when I was bored. It has a few funny moments near the beginning, but it is a really really really bad movie. This is the sort of thing you would end a friendship over if someone recommended it to you. I just want to forget about it. No one needs to watch this abomination, but they do need to know why stuff like this exists.
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7/10
Really Good Movie
fluffchop16 December 2021
Obviously the world is run by Reptilian aliens as a global elite that control everything. That goes without saying. What this movie does is it picks apart how the media deliberately dances around the truth to exploit various subjects for it's own ratings. Ratings equals money for the pockets of these media types who get rich out of exploiting such truths for their own ends. It's a circus within a circus as one guy is lead astray by a token sow who aspires to be such a media "personality". Entertaining, enjoyable and fun to watch.
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3/10
Satire = "We know the movie sucks but...."
jamaisj18 August 2022
If you're looking for a reason to make fun of militia or believe in conspiracy theories, this is your movie. Otherwise, this falls under the general "we know it sucked so we called it a 'satire' so people would think it's supposed to be a dark comedy instead of the failed actioner it actually is".
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9/10
More nuanced than you'd expect
aeongale22 November 2021
The only people this film could upset are those Qanon idiots that got sucked into that garbage. Other's might not like it because it's got that awkward Napoleon Dynamite style of humour to it. Given the budget it's an excellent production all-round. The care given to the dialogue gives Duncan's character full dimensions, he's not simply a stereotype, though there's hamming up of stereotypes throughout the film. Simply marvellous.
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7/10
Those pesky lizard people...
paul_haakonsen19 November 2021
I stumbled upon the 2020 conspiracy theory comedy "The Pizzagate Massacre" (aka "Duncan") here in 2021. And I have to say that I was immediately drawn to the movie's cover. It was just oozing with cheesiness, pardon the pun. And reading the movie's synopsis just helped to win me over and I had to sit down to watch what writer and director John Valley had to offer with "The Pizzagate Massacre".

And it was definitely well worth the time to sit down and watch "The Pizzagate Massacre", because this movie was every bit unique as it was entertaining.

The storyline told in "The Pizzagate Massacre" was enjoyable, and it writer John Valley was definitely good at taking jabs at the importance of media, lizard people stories and conspiracy theories. And it was all done in a very entertaining manner. I have to say that I enjoyed the storyline from beginning to end.

I was not familiar with the cast that they had managed to get together for "The Pizzagate Massacre". And watching a movie with unfamiliar cast members is enjoyable to me, as I don't associate them with previously portrayed characters from other movies. I will say that lead actor Tinus Seaux was just phenomenal in the role of Duncan in this movie.

I found "The Pizzagate Massacre" to be a surprisingly good and entertaining movie, and it is certainly one that I can recommend you watch. This was am movie that snuck in under my radar, but I am very happy that I stumbled upon it and picked it up.

My rating of "The Pizzagate Massacre" lands on a seven out of ten stars.
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6/10
Strange movie!!
tman-2128920 February 2022
This movie is kinda like a train wreck, you want to look away but can't. Nothing is particularly special about it but yet it's strange and odd enough to have kept my attention. If you give this a look you should know in the first 20-25mins if you want to go forward with it.
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7/10
Poor Meep!!!
gab-6759927 November 2021
Although this movie was supposed to be funny it brought only a few laughs. I think it was more about the actors and their abilities to keep you interested in what they will do next. This movie was not a bad B - flick. I do know one thing they did know how to do gore and for that I gave them a 7 instead of a 6. They should have at least ended with the ppl still in the closet trying to escape.
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8/10
Deserves more attention, a B movie but a bloody good one!
caioshughes21 November 2021
I had to create an account to review this because I thought it deserves a lot more attention than it's getting.

It's 100% a future cult movie. Far more interesting and entertaining than the marvel/dc/starwars cliches that the studios only seem interested in making now.

It's not going to win any oscars but it was entertaining and original. A comedic look at conspiracy theory's, gun culture, the media that encourages it & what are possible outcomes. Its a movie genre/subject that should be being made!

It punches much higher than its low budget should have allowed. Well done to everyone involved. Some good performances all round really.

I've given it 8 out of 10 for entertainment value & effort. Will try keep an eye out for future projects from the team behind it. With further backing I'd imagine something even stronger.
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9/10
Deeper than you might think
pthomasfoy2 October 2023
This film was a total surprise. The acting is terrific, fun crazy dialogue and super cinematography. The movie explores race, politics, loneliness and media responsibilities. It feels natural and, despite the heaviness of the themes, still managed to make me laugh out loud in parts. The characters are multifaceted and played well.

The character of Duncan Plump is compelling. I can see why the movie was originally going to be called simply, "Duncan." My only quibble with the movie was the very end. I didn't feel like the last few minutes matched the tone of the overall film. Go into this one with an open mind and you won't be disappointed.
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8/10
The Pizzagate Massacre.... Way better than it appears.
punisherversion12 December 2021
The Pizzagate Massacre Written and directed by John Valley

Exploitation films have a history of taking topics that others may find offensive or downright uncomfortable and turning out entertainment about it. Conspiracy theories used to be fun before they became widely accepted as reality despite evidence to the contrary. I loved listening to late night Coast to Coast AM. It came with a little bit of mockery and a little bit of wonder. But that all changed.

Suddenly everything was a conspiracy and everything was political. People would believe wild and outlandish claims with little to no evidence of its existence. It spread like a wildfire. It began to affect regular people's lives. It culminated in the Pizzagate killings. The theories had become violence. It was too much. It was no longer fun and games.

This movie takes inspiration from that. It is about getting into the mind of somebody like that. His name is Duncan. It understands how insane this actually is. You have to put a satirical edge on it because if you don't laugh, what are you going to do. Duncan lives in his van. He's a gun enthusiast and he is part of a local militia. He listens to the Terri Lee show which is InfoWars in a different form. Karen is an amateur journalist who after losing her job at the Terri Lee show begins her own investigation into the Pizzagate conspiracy. She needs somebody to watch her back and enlists the help of Duncan.

This movie sounds like a terrifying thriller. It is not played that way, not entirely. It has a foreboding atmosphere and the soundtrack follows suit. It carries a big Taxi Driver vibe with it as well. It is undeniable that Taxi Driver is the inspiration for this movie. Duncan contains so much anger at the world. He feels outside looking in and he feels constantly humiliated.

This movie was originally called Duncan and the focus is upon his character. There is a good article about this movie's production history. Duncan seems like a cut and dried lunatic fringe. He's not and while the title might be misleading somewhat, it is still accurate. Things escalate as the pizza place is brought into it.

This movie is really good. I was surprised by how much emotion and character is brought out in Duncan. The performance by Tinus Seaux as Duncan shows the different sides of him. He feels lost by not recognizing his world anymore. He is definitely confused by the information that is being fed to him. His life is in flux.

He is paired with Karen Black. She is using Duncan to create her film. You're not entirely sure what she believes in. It is a swirling mix of people who don't trust each other or what they hear. They believe in things that go against what most rational people know to be true.

It does have out there characters and wild situations. Most people who don't watch these shows and don't frequent these circles will be scratching your head but keep an open mind at least about this movie. I know it's called The Pizzagate Massacre and it does play on what you expect from a title like that but at the same time it expands the characters. The comparison to Taxi Driver is extremely apt and it is a well made and interesting low budget film. I give this movie a B.
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8/10
Honestly not bad
johnzavicariv21 November 2021
I watch a lot of tv, i love B movies and i gotta say this was done pretty well. I was entertained thru the whole thing. It kept me engaged the whole time and was pretty funny. I give it 8 stars for a B movies (dark comedy) under A films it would probably be a 3-4. Stop rating A and B movies under the same.
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10/10
this film is great lol
theadhdgod23 November 2021
I cant even find anything wrong with this film, its crazy AF the story is bonkers but it some how is just so entertaining and severely underrated Alexandria Payne is an amazing actress and Tinus Seaux is a also a great actor, never heard of either of them but in this film they had great chemistry, its a very dark comedy but it is done so well, ignore the bad ratings, they love boring comic book films and high budget blockbusters but the director producer and writer deserves recognition, before anybody says im part of this production f@"k off... this is probably one of the best low budget films ive seen, it dont feel low budget because its done so well and all the actors did a great job actually, i will definitely watch this film again with friends, you will enjoy it, I'm easy to please, im giving it a 10 because they had such a low budget and made a masterpiece in my eyes.
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8/10
Look... Just hear me out
keitronwallace17 August 2022
I get it. This was made to poke some serious fun at the "right people". I get it. But let's just take some time to appreciate this movie. Despite its small budget, the cinematography is stellar; the characters are so dang fun; the dialogue is equal parts absurd and believable (let's be honest. I've heard some insane conversations over the years, I am sure you have as well). I was pleasantly surprised by this film. If you are open minded, please give this film a chance.
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8/10
Way better than you expect it to be
davisdenton8 April 2022
Warning: Spoilers
This movie is so much better than I thought it would be. The actors are very good considering they're all C-listers. For a low budget movie this group crushed it. It was highly entertaining, kinda wished they'd found actual lizards.
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8/10
Well done satire
matthew_hoh10 January 2022
I went into this film holding my breath. I had heard an excellent podcast interview with the director/writer, but was worried the film would not translate his vision and message adequately. It totally did.

This movie was produced and filmed for less than $250k. I couldn't find anything that gave away the limited budget. The filming was obviously done by a talented and experienced crew, while the acting was earnest and sincere. The dialogue was smart, quick and often funny, with more than a few striking/poignant moments.

Most especially, and this is where the podcast interview really held true, was that the film allowed empathy with those like the main characters Duncan and Karen, and, by extension, those on the conspiracy encumbered political right in the US. Yes, I know, in our hyper polarized, identity politics driven duopoly we are not supposed to feel such things towards the Others, so this is where The Pizzagate Massacre really triumphs.

And as the title of this review states, which I feel I must restate, this is a satire, so go into the film please with that understanding in mind.

I hope this film leads to the writer/director, John M Valley, receiving more and greater financial and production backing for upcoming works because he deserves it.

For those interested in the podcast interview, you can find it on the Parallax Views Podcast with JG Michael.
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8/10
A hilarious terrifying low budget satire THAT WORKS!
leoporth-029221 October 2022
Ignore the rating its getting spammed with bad grades from conspiracy theory forums. A satire that takes the basic premise of the real life pizzagate conspiracy incident and fictionalizes it in order to run with it. It has a lot of heart and sympathy for our conspiracy theorist main characters even though these are dangerous radical people. The film does a great job driving home that these people are the victims of the Alex Jones type provocateurs of the world. A lot of bits hilarious, and a little bit terrifying, multiple times the movie let's you think you understand how it's going to play out and then veers left. Highly recommend.
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10/10
I love it when satire is actual satire
tutoring-022559 December 2021
Listen, Duncan Plump has come unstuck from reality.

It's funny, it's violent, the score is great, a dude hangs dong, it's not a self-congratulating liberal fantasy, by a genuine, empathetic, and startling look at what's going on.in the heads of a lot of people all across the country.

I'm never one to be hyperbolic, but this is the greatest work of satire e recreated.
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8/10
Well Written Satire that Hits the Mark
Reviews_of_the_Dead3 March 2021
Warning: Spoilers
This was a movie that I heard about through the Nightmares Film Festival for its World premiere. It was listed as a midnight feature, so after Jaime went to bed, I made an iced coffee and settled in. The premise really intrigued me as well. The synopsis here is a dark social satire inspired by the real life conspiracy theory known as Pizzagate. An amateur journalist and a far-right militiaman team up to expose the ugly truth behind rumors involving sex cults, a pizza place and the lizard people.

Now we start this off with Danny Johnson (Derek Babb) getting us up to speed about what this movie is going to entail. It is done in the form of how a true crime show would start and this sucked me in. This crime spree took place in Texas and it involves kids, sex trafficking, pizza shop basements, lizard people posing as politicians and the illuminati. We then see a woman thrown on to a bed and she's tied up. The woman is Karen Black (Alexandria Payne). She is black and there's a confederate flag above her.

It then informs us that we're in Waco, Texas the day before. Karen is an intern on her first day. She is working for a right wing political show that is hosted by Terri Lee (Lee Eddy). Her show is in the vein of an Alex Jones, where she is spouting off about the conspiracy that the 'main-stream media' isn't talking about Toots pizza and what they're doing in the basement with sex trafficking. Karen messes up pretty bad and she is let go. Terri has protestors outside for the topic of her show and she's being blocked in by them. That's when Duncan Plump (Tinus Seaux) comes to her rescue. He pulls a gun on the protestors, they back up and she's allowed to leave.

Karen believes what Terri was talking about on her show so she seeks out the militia that Duncan is a part of. They seem to be pretty well organized and we get a scene to show how good Duncan is through a paintball game. Karen interrupts their meeting that night sharing what her plan is. There was supposed to be an election where Philip (John Valley), or going by his code name of Side Thorn, wants to take over. Hollis (Mike Dellens) is their current president and he's pretty tame in what he wants to do. Philip has much bigger plans if he gets elected.

Duncan follows Karen home and wants her to give up her plan. He is forced to help her though when Philip shows up as well, stating he'll take her to Austin to check out Toots Pizza for $500. Duncan knows he's reckless and his plan will get them into trouble as well unwanted attention from the world. It turns into a wild ride of murder and the truth of these conspiracies.

That's where I want to leave my recap. This wasn't the movie that I was expecting, but that is not to say it was a bad thing. It is much smarter than anticipated and wasn't as wild either. I also should point out here, that this isn't a horror film either. Again, not a major issue.

What really struck me with this movie is how rational Duncan really is. Karen states this in the movie that during their drive from Waco to Austin, he is fleshing out ideas and his rationale behind it makes sense. He does believe that there are sex trafficking rings and there are lizard people/illuminati that are running things, he just doesn't believe what people like Terri are saying on their shows. This actually made me stop and think about some of things that he's saying. It works so well that this is done in a satirical manner as well.

With how it is presenting things, I also love what we're seeing with this militia. When we hear about them in the news, we are hearing the bad things that they're doing. Philip is upset that currently it is nothing more than a gun club. Hollis is running it where they're trained well and doing good for the community. Philip is the outlier here that wants to make them into the homegrown terrorist group that the media does tend to portray groups like this. I think that there is truth on both sides of this, but I love how this is presented here.

Going along with this idea, the character of Duncan is quite interesting. He's supposed to be one of the children of David Koresh. Duncan was born into this lifestyle. I love that he's distrustful of the government for good reasons with what happened during the standoff with the government. He doesn't have to work since he got a large settlement. What we see here though is that he's weird. Karen keeps taking videos of him, which he tells her not to. When they're taken out of context, it makes him look like the bad guy. He's really not, but he's made a scapegoat and there are a lot of assumptions made about him. This movie really made me think about things for sure.

I don't know if it would work as well without the performances. Seaux does a great job as this title character. He's out of touch with reality a bit, he's odd, but he has a good heart. I love the come to realization that he gets as things progress with the story. Payne is an interesting character to challenge his beliefs and her character is odd too. She points out that the allegations of what happened in Waco caused the government to step in. She is wondering why it isn't taking the sex trafficking allegations seriously. It did make me ponder what is making one more valid than the other. I guess the true answer is facts and data. Valley is over the top and I thought he was hilarious. Eddy does well as the female Alex Jones character and I'd say the rest of the cast rounded this out for what was needed.

Aside from that, I think we get some interesting editing to tell this story. We're coming in at the end of everything and showing us what led up to that moment. There are also intercuts of interviews with Karen and I like that we learn where things end up in the wake of all of this. It really felt real what was happening there and without getting the true story, I can see how those alive can alter history to benefit them.

So now with that said, this wasn't the movie I was expecting, but what we got really hits some interesting social commentary. The satirical nature really benefits it in my opinion. It can take on concepts and ideas that cause major debates in a way where you can truly reflect on them. What Duncan, Karen and the rest go through and the realizations made quite interesting for these touchy subjects. There's something interesting at the end as well that I thought was good too. There aren't really a lot in the way of effects, but what we got was good. The acting really helps carry this as well. I would say to give this a watch; whatever side of the political spectrum you're on as I feel it tackles the ideas in a rational way for sure. I commend Valley for that. I'd rate this as a good movie for sure.
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