Rise of the Machine Girls (2019) Poster

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5/10
Eh, let's do it all in post
selfdestructo23 August 2022
Rise of the Machine Girls is Machine Girl in name only. You might even consider it a reboot. Written and directed by Yuki Kobayashi, he has seemingly abandoned nearly everything that made Noboru Iguchi's original so great. Like, say, a coherent storyline.

I counted exactly ONE good gory practical effect. Yeah, it's smelling like a modern-day reboot. There were a few things I really did like, though. The young petite Asian girls who play the title characters, and did a great deal of the action, were quite competent (well, at least the CGI's going to make it look that way). Particularly Ami (Himena Tsukimya), who really kicks ass. Credit to her stunt double, too, doing all that background mayhem. Speaking of which, there is a pretty spectacular 6-minute, one-shot fighting sequence that is kind of the center piece of this movie. That took some work and choreography. IIRC, this occurs immediately after the opening credits sequence (inserted... with 15 minutes left to go in the movie!).

I loved the addition of Ami's shotgun (it looked like there were a couple add-ons there, to make her gun more elaborate). Seemed to have a nice kick, with a satisying "boom" sound effect to go with it every time she pulled the trigger. I also really dug the girls' dance, accompanied with the song they do at the very end of the movie.

There may have been a good movie in here somewhere, if someone had bothered to write a story (or at least one that's not asinine), and not have been so preoccupied with sheer lunacy. Also, practical effects. Come on, people!
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7/10
Crack Smoking Japanese Lunacy. Yaaaaaawwwwnnn!
DavyDissonance20 April 2022
Some... Yee..... Gah... Alright. Well, what did you expect? Something equivocal to The Sound Of Music? Of course, the Japanese film industry continues to crank out nihilistic, incoherent, megalomaniacal garbage and, yes, even with its unpredictable leftfield psychosis, has become predictable.... if that makes sense. Other than the concept of hot Japanese girls in school girl outfits with firm badonkadonks and mechanical machine gun for an arm, Rise Of The Machine Girls is not relevant to the original. The film is predominantly idiotic with its fake CGI blood effects, gore, gun toting over the top action, bizarre characters, bizarre carnal crap and a nonsensical story. BUT this movie has my home skillet TAK in it and even though most of the movies he is in sucks a prostate clean, he is awesome and makes any movie worth watching..... mostly. Yup, Japan went from Akira Kurosawa to inflatable boobs. And what can I say? I'm a sucker for crap so I liked Rise Of The Machine Girls. Ugh.
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