- [Shirley Schmidt is sending Alan to New Orleans to help out on a case]
- Denny Crane: I just heard! New Orleans! My penis is already packed!
- Alan Shore: Denny, I would love for you to join, but this particular excursion is a rather serious one. Maybe you and I could go another time.
- Denny Crane: Are you nuts? That damned tornado wiped out half the place. There's no time like the present. Alan, we must seize the hookers - uh, the day.
- Alan Shore: You know, Denny, technically it wasn't so much a tornado as a hurricane. And you're holding a kazoo.
- Denny Crane: Not just any kazoo. A trombone kazoo. A go-to-New-Orleans-under-the-pretext-of-some-legal-case-to-play-with-a-Dixie-land-band kazoo.
- Vanessa Walker: I only have two plane tickets.
- Denny Crane: Oh, gee, I only have a Gulf Stream.
- Alan Shore: I think Denny wants to come, Vanessa.
- Denny Crane: Denny Crane: Down on the Bayou.
- [Alan and Denny talk on the balcony about how horrible it must have been in New Orleans in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina]
- Alan Shore: I tried closing my eyes again... to imagine. I couldn't. Nobody could, I suppose, unless they were there.
- Denny Crane: I was there. Well, I flew over in my Gulf Stream. Doesn't that count?
- Alan Shore: To some.