In Bruges (2008)
Colin Farrell: Ray
Photos
Quotes
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Chloë : So what do you do, Raymond?
Ray : I... shoot people for money.
Chloë : [smiling] What kinds of people?
Ray : Priests, children... you know, the usual.
Chloë : Is there a lot of money to be made in that business?
Ray : There is for priests. There isn't for children. So what is it you do, Chloë?
Chloë : I sell cocaine and heroin to Belgian film crews.
Ray : Do you?
Chloë : Do I look like I do?
Ray : You do, actually. Do I... look like I shoot people?
Chloë : No. Just children.
-
Ken : Coming up?
Ray : What's up there?
Ken : The view.
Ray : The view of what? The view of down here? I can see that down here.
Ken : Ray, you are about the worst tourist in the whole world.
Ray : Ken, I grew up in Dublin. I love Dublin. If I grew up on a farm, and was retarded, Bruges might impress me but I didn't, so it doesn't.
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Ray : Harry, I've got an idea.
Harry : What?
Ray : My room faces out the canal, right? I'm going to go back to me room, jump into the canal, see if I can swim to the other side and escape.
Harry : All right.
Ray : If you go outside around the corner, you can shoot at me from there and try to get me. That way we'll leave this lady and her baby out of the whole entire thing.
Harry : You completely promise to jump into the canal? I don't want to run out there, come back in ten minutes, and find you fucking hiding in a cupboard.
Ray : I completely promise, Harry. I'm not going to risk having another little kid dying on me.
Harry : So, hang on - I go outside and I go which way? Right or left?
Ray : [upset] You go right, don't you? You can see it from the doorway! It's a big fucking canal!
Harry : All right. Jesus. I only just got here, haven't I? Okay, on the count of one, two, three, go. Okay?
Ray : Okay.
[long pause]
Ray : What? Who says it?
Harry : Well you say it.
Marie : You people are crazy.
-
[last lines]
Ray : There's a Christmas tree somewhere in London with a bunch of presents underneath it that'll never be opened. And I thought, if I survive all of this, I'd go to that house, apologize to the mother there, and accept whatever punishment she chose for me. Prison... death... didn't matter. Because at least in prison and at least in death, you know, I wouldn't be in fuckin' Bruges. But then, like a flash, it came to me. And I realized, fuck man, maybe that's what hell is: the entire rest of eternity spent in fuckin' Bruges. And I really really hoped I wouldn't die. I really really hoped I wouldn't die.
-
Ray : One gay beer for my gay friend, one normal beer for me because I am normal.
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Ken : [Ray walks into the bar high on cocaine] How'd your date go?
Ray : My date involved two instances of extreme violence, one instance of her hand on my cock and my finger up her thing which lasted all too briefly - isn't that always the way? - , one instance of me stealing five grams of very high-quality cocaine and one instance of me blinding a poofy little skinhead: so all in all... my evening pretty much balanced out, fine.
-
Ken : What the fuck are you doing, Ray?
Ray : What the fuck are 'you' doing?
[Ken sticks pistol behind his back]
Ken : Nothing.
Ray : Oh, my God... you were gonna kill me.
Ken : No, I wa - You were gonna kill yourself!
Ray : Well... I'm allowed.
Ken : No, you're not!
Ray : What? I'm not allowed, and you are? How's that fair?
-
Ray : [beating a tourist that he believes to be American] That's for John Lennon, you Yankee fuckin' cunt!
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Overweight Man : Been to the top of the tower?
Ray : Yeah... yeah, it's rubbish.
Overweight Man : It is? The guide book says it's a must see.
Ray : Well you lot ain't going up there.
Overweight Man : Pardon me? Why?
Ray : I mean, it's all winding stairs. I'm not being funny.
Overweight Man : What exactly are you trying to say?
Ray : What exactly am I trying to say? You's a bunch of fuckin' elephants.
[overweight man attempts to chase Ray around but quickly grows tired]
Ray : Come on, leave it fatty!
[the overweight women calm down the overweight man]
Overweight Woman #2 : [to Ray] You know you're just the rudest man. The rudest man!
Ken : [coming back from the tower] What's all that about?
[Ray shrugs]
Ken : They're not going up there.
[to overweight family]
Ken : Hey, guys. I wouldn't go up there. It's really narrow.
Overweight Woman #2 : Screw you, motherfucker!
Ken : [to Ray] What was that about?
Ray : [shrugs]
-
Chloë : There's never been a classic movie made in Bruges until now.
Ray : Of course there hasn't. It's a shithole.
Chloë : Bruges is my home town, Ray.
Ray : Well, it's still a shithole.
Chloë : It's not a shithole!
Ray : What? Even midgets have to take drugs to stick it.
Chloë : Okay. So, you've insulted my home town. You were doing really well, Raymond. Why don't you tell me some Belgium jokes while you're at it?
Ray : Don't know any Belgium jokes, and if I did I think I'd have the good sense not to... hang on. Is Belgium with all those child abuse murders lately? I do know a Belgium joke. What's Belgium famous for? Chocolates and child abuse, and they only invented the chocolates to get to the kids.
[Ray sees Chloë's shocked expression]
Ray : What?
Chloë : One of the girls they murdered was a friend of mine.
Ray : [after a long pause, feeling bad] I'm sorry, Chloë.
Chloë : One of the girls they murdered wasn't a friend of mine. I just wanted to make you feel bad. And it worked! Quite well.
-
Ray : Maybe that's what hell is, the entire rest of eternity spent in fucking Bruges.
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Ken : And at the same time, at the same time as trying to lead a good life, I have to reconcile that with the fact that with the fact that, yes, I have killed people. Not many people. And most of them were not very nice people. Apart from one person.
Ray : Who was that?
Ken : This bloke Danny Aliband's brother. He was just trying to protect his brother. Like you or I would. He was just a lollipop man. But he came at me with a bottle. What are you gonna do? I shot him down.
Ray : Hmm. In my book, though, someone comes at you with a bottle, I'm sorry, that is a deadly weapon, he's gotta take the consequences.
Ken : I know that in my heart, but I also know he was trying to protect his brother, you know?
Ray : I know, but a bottle, that can kill ya. That's a case of "It's you or him". If he'd come at you with his bare hands, that'd be different. That wouldn't have been fair.
Ken : But technically, someone's bare hands, they can kill you too. They can be deadly weapons too. What if he knew Karate, say?
Ray : You said he was a lollipop man.
Ken : He WAS a lollipopman.
Ray : What a lollipop man doing, knowing fucking Karate?
Ken : I'm just saying...
Ray : How old was he?
Ken : About fifty.
Ray : What's a fifty year old lollipop man doing, knowing fucking Karate? What was he, a Chinese lollipop man?
Ken : Course not.
Ray : Well then.
-
Ken : [looking at a surreal Bosch painting] It's Judgment Day, you know?
Ray : No. What's that then?
Ken : Well, it's, you know, the final day on Earth, when mankind will be judged for the crimes they've committed and that.
Ray : Oh. And see who gets into heaven and who gets into hell and all that.
Ken : Yeah. And what's the other place?
Ray : Purgatory.
Ken : Purgatory... what's that?
Ray : Purgatory's kind of like the in-betweeny one. You weren't really shit, but you weren't all that great either. Like Tottenham.
[pause]
Ray : Do you believe in all that stuff, Ken?
Ken : About Tottenham?
-
[first lines]
Ray : After I killed them, I dropped the gun in the Thames, washed the residue off me hands in the bathroom of a Burger King, and walked home to await instructions. Shortly thereafter the instructions came through. "Get the fuck out of London, youse dumb fucks. Get to Bruges." I didn't even know where Bruges fucking was.
[pause]
Ray : It's in Belgium.
-
Jimmy : There's gonna be a war, man. I can see it. There's gonna be a war between the blacks and between the whites. You ain't even gonna need a uniform no more. This ain't gonna be a war where you pick your side. Your side's already picked for you.
Ray : And I know whose side I'm fighting on. I'm fighting with the blacks. The whites are gonna get their heads kicked in!
Jimmy : You don't decide this shit, man. Your side's already picked for you.
Ray : Well, who are the half-castes gonna fight with?
Jimmy : The blacks, man. That's obvious.
Ray : What about the Pakistanis?
Jimmy : The blacks.
Ray : What about... Think of a hard one. What about the Vietnamese?
Jimmy : The blacks!
Ray : Well, I'm definitely fighting with the blacks if they've got the Vietnamese.
[pause]
Ray : So, hang on. Would all of the white midgets in the world be fighting against all the black midgets in the world?
Jimmy : Yeah.
Ray : That would make a good film!
Jimmy : You don't know how much shit I've had to take off of black midgets, man.
-
Ray : A lot of midgets tend to kill themselves. A disproportionate amount, actually. Hervé Villechaize off of Fantasy Island. I think somebody from the Time Bandits did. I suppose they must get really sad about like... being really little and that... people looking at them, laughing at them, calling them names. You know, "short arse". There's another famous midget. I miss him but I can't remember. It's not the R2D2 man; no, he's still going. I hope your midget doesn't kill himself. Your dream sequence will be fucked.
Chloë : He doesn't like being called a midget. He prefers dwarf.
Ray : This is exactly my point! People going around calling you a midget when you want to be called a dwarf. Of course you're going to blow your head off.
-
Ray : I don't hit women. I'd never hit a woman, Chloë! I hit a woman who was trying to hit me with a bottle! That's different, that's self defence, isn't it? Or a woman who did karate. I'd never hit a woman generaly, Chloë. Don't think that. God, you're pretty.
Chloë : I have to make a call.
Ray : Oh no. You've gone off me, haven't you? Just cause I hit that fucking cow.
[she kisses him]
-
Ken : This morning, and this afternoon, we are doing what I want to do. Got it?
Ray : Of course. Which, I presume, will involve culture.
Ken : We shall strike a balance between culture and fun.
Ray : Somehow I believe, Ken, that the balance shall tip in the favor of culture, like a big fat fucking retarded fucking black girl on a see-saw opposite... a dwarf.
-
Ray : Jesus, Ken, I'm trying to talk about...
Ken : I know what you're trying to talk about.
Ray : I killed a little boy. You keep bringing up the fucking lollipop man.
Ken : You didn't mean to kill a little boy.
Ray : I know I didn't mean to... but because of the choices I made, and the course that I put into action, that little boy isn't here anymore, and he'll never be here again.
[pause]
Ray : I mean here in the world, not here in Belgium. Well he'll never be here in Belgium either, will he? I mean, he might've wanted to come here when he got older. Don't know why. And that's all because of me. He's dead because of me. And I'm trying to... been trying to get me head around it, but I can't. I will have always have killed that little boy. That ain't ever going away. Ever. Unless... maybe I go away.
Ken : Don't even think like that.
-
Ken : Ray, did we or did we not agree that if I let you go on your date tonight, you'd do the things I wanted to do today?
Ray : We are doing the things you wanted to do today.
Ken : And I would do them without you throwing a fucking moody, like a five year old who's dropped all his sweets.
Ray : We didn't agree to that.
-
Ray : [crying] I killed a little boy!
[Ken embraces Ray]
Ken : Then save the next little boy. Just go away somewhere, get out of this business, and try to do something good. You're not going to help anybody dead. You're not going to bring that boy back. But you might save the next one.
Ray : What am I going to be, a doctor? You need exams.
-
Ray : Murder, father.
Priest : Why did you murder someone, Raymond?
Ray : For money, father.
Priest : For money? You murdered someone for money?
Ray : Yes, father. Not out of anger. Not out of nothing. For money.
Priest : Who did you murder for money, Raymond?
Ray : You, father.
Priest : I'm sorry?
Ray : I said you, father. What are you, deaf?
[Ray raises pistol]
Ray : Harry Waters says hello.
-
Policeman : [to Ray, who is trying to escape from Bruges on the train] Are you Irish?
Ray : Yea.
Policeman : What is your name?
Ray : Er-Derek Fer... ler.
Policeman : You heet the Canadian.
Ray : What?
Policeman : You heet the Canadian.
Ray : I heat the Canadian? I don't know what you're talking about.
[the policeman motions down the compartment toward more policemen and the two Canadian tourists whom Ray beat up earlier]
Canadian Guy : That's the motherfucker!
Policeman : Come along. We are taking you back to Bruges.
Ray : Brilliant.
-
Ken : Up there, the top altar, is a vial brought back by a Flemish knight from the Crusades in the Holy Land. And that vial, do you know what it's said to contain?
Ray : No, what's it said to contain?
Ken : It's said to contain some drops of Jesus Christ's blood. Yeah, that's how this church got its name. Basilica of the Holy Blood.
Ray : Yeah. Yeah.
Ken : And this blood, right, though it's dried blood, at different times over many years, they say it turned back into liquid. Turned back into liquid from dried blood. At various times of great stress.
Ray : Yeah?
Ken : Yeah. So, yeah, I'm gonna go up in the queue and touch it, which is what you do.
Ray : Yeah?
Ken : Yeah. You coming?
Ray : Do I have to?
Ken : Do you have to? Of course you don't have to. It's Jesus' fucking blood, isn't it? Of course you don't fucking have to! Of *course* you don't fucking have to!
-
Ray : Why didn't you wave hello to me today when I waved hello to you today?
Jimmy : I was on a very strong horse tranquilizer today; Wasn't waving hello to anybody. Except... maybe to a horse.
Ray : Huh? What are you talking about?
Jimmy : Just horseshit.
Ray : You from America?
Jimmy : Yeah. Don't hold it against me.
Ray : Well, that's for me to decide, isn't it?
Ray : [to Denise] You from America too?
Denise : No, I'm from Amsterdam.
Ray : Amsterdam! Amsterdam's just a lot of bloody prostitutes, isn't it?
Denise : Yes, that's why I came to Bruges. Been trying to get a better price for my pussy here.
Ray : Huh?
[pause]
Ray : You two are weird. Would you like some cocaine?
-
Eirik : [holding Ray at gunpoint, after catching him making out with Chloë] That's my girlfriend, you fucking asshole!
Chloë : Eirik, what are you doing?
Eirik : Where you from, fucker?
Ray : Ireland, originally.
Eirik : And you think it's okay to come over to Belgium and fuck another man's girl?
Ray : I didn't know she had a boyfriend, alright? And I haven't fucked her anyway! Ask her! I only put me hand on it!
-
Ray : Hey-ho. Drowning your sorrows, huh?
Ken : What sorrows?
Ray : You know, being a sad, old, ugly little man.
Ray : [to the bartender] One gay beer please.
Ken : How'd your date go?
Ray : My date involved two instances of extreme violence, one instance of her hand on my cock and my finger up her thing, which lasted all too briefly.
[pauses]
Ray : Isn't that always the way? One instance of me stealing five grams of very-high-quality cocaine and one instance of me blinding a poofy little skinhead. So, all-in-all my evening pretty much balanced out fine.
Ken : You got five grams of coke?
Ray : I've got four grams on me and one gram in me which is why me heart is going like the clappers, as is I'm about to have a heart attack. So if I collapse any minute now please remember to tell the doctors that it might have something to do with the coke.
[all of the this is said in forty seconds]
-
Canadian Guy : I don't care if this is the smoking section, she directed right into my face! I don't wanna die just because of your fucking arrogance!
Ray : [thinking the tourist is American] Uh huh, is that what the Vietnamese used to say?
-
Ken : We're not staying here getting pissed. We are quietly sightseeing, like he says, and awaiting his call to see what we do next.
Ray : This is my vote on what we should do. We give it another day, two days, max. Then we check the papers again, and if there's still nothing in them, we phone him and say, 'Harry, thank you for the trip to Bruges, it's been very nice, all the old buildings and that, but we're coming back to London now, and hide out in a proper country, where it isn't all just fucking chocolates'.
-
Ray : See, Ken, this is the kind of hotel Harry should have put us in. A five-star, with prostitutes in it.
-
Ray : [while brushing teeth] Altogether, I've had five pints of beer and six bottles... no... six pints of beer and seven bottles, and you know what? I'm not even pissed.
-
Ray : A bottle! Don't bother.
-
Canadian Guy : Fucking unbelievable.
Ray : What's fucking unbelievable?
Canadian Guy : Are you talking to me?
Ray : [to himself] He pauses, even though he should just hit the cunt, and he repeats
[to the Canadian]
Ray : Yes, I am talking to you. What's fucking unbelievable?
Canadian Guy : Well, I'll tell you what's fucking unbelievable, shall I? Blowing cigarette smoke straight into myself and my girlfriend's face. That's fucking unbelievable.
Ray : This is the smoking section.
Canadian Guy : I don't care if it's the smoking section!
-
Ray : [reading Harry's profanity-ridden message] Geez, he's swears a lot, doesn't he?
-
Ken : That there is called the Gruuthuse Museum.
Ray : They all have funny names, don't they?
Ken : Yes, Flemish. In here it says, 'The Belgians twice sheltered fugitive English Kings from being murdered, 1471 and 1651.'
Ray : I used to hate history, didn't you? It's all just a load of stuff that's already happened.
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Ray : [after Jimmy doesn't wave back to Ray] Little fucking cunt.
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Ray : [to Chloe] You can't sell horse tranquilizers to a midget.
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Ray : [to Ken] At what point did all skinheads become poofs?
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Ray : [finding Chloë's drug stash] Cha-ching!
-
Ray : Canadians! I feel a bit bad. They didn't kill John Lennon, did they?
