South Park (TV Series)

Timmy 2000 (2000)

Matt Stone: Kyle Broflovski, Kenny McCormick, Jonesy, Mark, Battle of the Bands Host, Man in Crowd #3, Kurt Loder, Richard, Terrance, Gerald Broflovski

Photos 

Quotes 

• Chef : Hello there children

  Cartman , Kyle , Stan , Kenny McCormick : [calmly]  Hello Chef

  Chef : How's it going?

  Cartman , Kyle , Stan , Kenny McCormick : [politely]  Very well, thank you

  Chef : [suspicious]  Everything's fine? Why?

  Stan : Because we're on Ritalin

  Chef : What?

  Kyle : We all have attention deficit disorder, so we all started taking Ritalin

  Cartman : [talking like a stoner]  It really takes the edge off man, you should try it

  [takes a handful of pills] 

  Chef : So that's why all you children are acting so damned boring!

  Kyle : That's correct Chef

  Chef : Damnit, children, you don't need drugs to make you pay attention in school! In my day, if we didn't pay attention we got a belt to the bottom! Now they're tryin' to cure everything with drugs!

• Cartman : [all are high on Ritalin]  I think we should go to Lalalapalalala anyway just to see Phil Collins.

  Kyle : Yeah. I think Phil Collins rocks the house.

  Cartman : Sounds good.

  Cartman : Then it's decided. Phil Collins concert for all of us. Oh, hold still, Kenny.

  [hits Kenny in the face with a frying pan] 

  Stan : Oh my goodness, you killed Kenny.

  Kyle : Bastard.

• Mr. Garrison : Okay children let's settle down!

  [all the children sit there quietly and attentively] 

  Mr. Garrison : Huh I mean it, I want it quiet!

  [the children remain calm] 

  Mr. Garrison : My god Mr. Hat, these children are so boring on Ritalin. Huh, alright children, were going to learn about human reproduction, what do you think about that?

  [the children don't respond] 

  Mr. Garrison : Vaginas and penises! Butt sex!

  [no one says a word] 

  Mr. Garrison : Well damnit! Eric don't you have some smartass thing to say?

  Cartman : [calmly and politely]  What kind of smartass thing would I say Mr. Garrison?

  Mr. Garrison : [grabs his head in anger]  This is driving me crazy! I can't handle you little bastards being so mellow!

  Kyle : Gee you seem a little stressed Mr. Garrison, why don't you try some Ritalin?

  [hands a bottle to Mr. Garrison who grabs it and dumps the pills down his throat] 

  Cartman : There you go

  [hallucinates seeing a Christina Aguilera monster] 

  Cartman : Woah!

• Chef : [about the children taking Ritalin]  Oh it makes me sick! Those damned psychologists prescribe all kinds of medicines to you children without even caring about the side effects!

  Stan : But there are no side effects Chef

  Kyle : Not at all

  Cartman : [hallucinates seeing a Christina Aguilera monster]  Did you guys see that?

  Stan : See what?