"South Park" Two Days Before the Day After Tomorrow (TV Episode 2005) - Matt Stone as Kyle Broflovski, Interviewee #1, Interviewee #4, Reporter, Republican, Scientist #1, Man in Crowd #1, Man in Crowd #2, Man in Crowd #5, Gerald Broflovski, Fox News Reporter, Jimbo Kern, Kevin, Army General, Man in Community Centre #2, Man at End #3, Man at End #4, Man at End #7, Man at End #11, Man at End #13, Man at End #14

Kyle : Can you believe it, Stan? I never thought global warming could happen so fast. I guess I didn't listen.

Stan : Kyle, it... it isn't global warming.

Kyle : Huh?

Stan : Global warming isn't happening right now. It's not what caused the Beaverton flood.

Kyle : How do you know that?

Stan : Because I know what did cause the flood.

Kyle : George Bush?

Stan : No.

Kyle : Terrorists?

Stan : No.

Kyle : Communists?

Stan : No.

Kyle : Chinese radicals?

Stan : No.

Kyle : Cartman?

Stan : Sorta.

Kyle : Cartman flooded Beaverton?

Stan : Shhhh! Not exactly. We were messing around on this guy's new boat and Cartman egged me on, and I crashed it into the Beaverton dam.

Kyle : Dude, you have to tell everybody! Right now!

Cartman : Hey Stan. Aw, goddamn it, you told Kyle, didn't you?

Kyle : Stan, people in Beaverton are still trapped on the roofs! Nobody's helping them because they think they can't go outside!

Cartman : Aw, here we go, see, I told you! If you're so caring, Kyle, why don't you share some of your Jew gold with the people caught in the flood?
Reporter : Tom, I'm standing just outside of Chicago, where the panic of global warming has already caused countless deaths. Already, we're reporting that the death toll here in Chicago is over 600 billion people.

See also