Star Trek: Voyager (TV Series)

Tinker Tenor Doctor Spy (1999)

Kate Mulgrew: Capt. Kathryn Janeway

Quotes 

• [as The Doctor sings La Donna E Mobile in the mess hall, Tuvok begins to cry] 

  Tom Paris : [quietly]  Tuvok...

  [Tuvok goes from crying to laughing uncontrollably, then grunting, as if in pain] 

  Tom Paris : Tuvok.

  [Tuvok starts thrashing around] 

  Captain Janeway : [clicks her combadge]  Janeway to Security, get a team to the mess hall right away!

  The Doctor : Stand back! He's been seized by the pon farr! A neurochemical imbalance is driving him to mate. We won't be able to reason with him!

  The Doctor : [starts singing to the melody of the music]  Tuvok, I understand / you are a Vulcan man. / You have just gone without / For seven years, about. / Paris, please find a way / To load a hypospray. / I will give you the sign / Just aim for his behind. / Hormones are raging, / Synapses blazing. / It's all so veee-...

  [Tom loads and throws the hypospray to the Doctor, who catches it while sustaining a note] 

  The Doctor : ...hery illogical.

  [injects Tuvok in the butt with the hypospray; Tuvok collapses] 

  The Doctor : [finishing the song]  Illogical. Iii-ll... illogical.

• Captain Janeway : [after the Doctor has mastered the 'field test']  I'm going to authorize a research project, to explore your command abilities. You're a natural.

• Captain Janeway : [reading from a PADD]  "To Captain Kathryn Janeway, Starship Voyager, from Emergency Medical Hologram, Starship Voyager. Topic: Status of Emergency Medical Hologram, Starship Voyager."

• Captain Janeway : [commenting on The Doctor's nude drawings of Seven]  He does the hands very well.

• Captain Janeway : Well, I guess it's time to turn fantasy into reality.

• [the Doctor has filed a formal grievance, along with a request to be made captain in the event of a catastrophic emergency] 

  Captain Janeway : I don't want anybody to be uncomfortable on this ship. I guess we should all try to be a little more considerate of his feelings.

  Tom Paris : Captain, he does it to himself. He's Chief Medical Officer. Is it our fault that's not enough for him?

• Captain Janeway : Just remember, I'm still the Captain.