South Park (TV Series)

Towelie (2001)

Matt Stone: Kyle Broflovski, Kenny McCormick, Gamesphere Logo Voice, Tynacorp Security #1, Sergeant Masters, Marine #2, Marine #4, Commercial Terms and Conditions

Quotes 

• Kyle Broflovski : [everyone's driving around]  How long has it been since you've been back there?

  Towelie : I've been wandering around on my own for the past few weeks. Ya know, helpin' people out with towel safety and proper towel use. It's important!

  Eric Cartman : No it isn't.

  Towelie : Is.

  Eric Cartman : No it isn't!

  Towelie : Is.

  Towelie : Wait turn down here. It's down this dirt road.

  Stan Marsh : Brake Kenny, brake.

  [Kenny turns car to dirt road] 

  Towelie : Maybe it was down that dirt road.

  Stan Marsh : Dude, don't you remember where it is?

  Towelie : I can't remember, it all looks the same. Hold on, let me get high. Then I'll remember where it is.

  [Towelie smokes the pot and get really high] 

  Stan Marsh : Alright, so where is it?

  Towelie : [Towelie talks slowly and is very sluggish]  Where's what?

  Kyle Broflovski : [the boys scream]  The base where you're from and where our Okama Gamesphere is.

  Stan Marsh : Alright, that does it. Brake angrily Kenny.

  [Kenny brakes the car fast] 

  Stan Marsh : Now listen Towelie, we've just about had it with you!

  Towelie : Well calm down.

  Kyle Broflovski : That's it, you're not getting high again until we have our Okama Gamesphere back.

  Towelie : That's my last J, asshole!

  Kyle Broflovski : I don't care! You better remember where your base is!

  Towelie : Oh man, why is everyone ridin' me today? God damn it.

• Stan Marsh : Come on Towelie, the guy said you have the security system in your memory banks.

  Towelie : Hey, it's been a long time.

  Eric Cartman : You just have no long term memory because you get high all the time.

  Towelie : [look at each other angrily]  Don't preach to me, Fatso.

  Eric Cartman : I can preach to you all I want because you're stupid!

  Towelie : You're stupid!

  Eric Cartman : Yeah, you're a towel!

  Towelie : You're a towel!

  Towelie : Just let me get high. I know I can remember if I get high.

  Stan Marsh : Oh, God damn it. Alright, fine. Here's your stupid lighter.

  Towelie : [Towelie smokes the pot] 

  [Towelie starts typing on the access code] 

  Towelie : Hold on. Wait a second

  [Towelie pretends to figure the access code, but is typing in the Soundbits of the song "Funkytown" on the keypad door] 

  Towelie : That's it.

  Kyle Broflovski : That's it?

  Towelie : Yeah, that's the melody to "Funkytown."

  Towelie : [types in the correct Soundbits of Funkytown on the keypad door and sings]  "Won't you take me down to 'Funkytown'."

  Stan Marsh : No Towelie, the entry code!

  Towelie : For what?