- Hilary Swank: Now, Rachel never let me in to her dressing room. She's very private about her process, but maybe we can get a sneak peek.
- Rachel Dratch: [drinking out of a whiskey bottle, shouting at a huge poster of Tina Fey] You don't own me. You're not the boss of me. You're not the boss of me! What you smilin' at, four eyes? Huh? What you smilin' at?
- Debbie Downer: [Debbie Downer is attending the Oscars] Congratulations, Hillary. You know that on the average, Oscar winners tend to die sooner than other actors and that winning two Oscars increases that chance by 50%.
- Chad Lowe: [incredulously] She was your favorite baby sitter when you were little?
- Hilary Swank: Yeah; I don't know, maybe she was more positive back then.