Roseanne (TV Series)

Past Imperfect (1994)

Roseanne Barr: Roseanne Conner

Photos 

Quotes 

• Roseanne Conner : [Dan's mother's been put in a mental hospital]  God, Dan, I'm so sorry.

  [moves to hug him] 

  Dan Conner : [backs away from her]  I just, I'm uh... just wanna go to bed.

  [walks off] 

• Jackie Harris : [at Jackie's, Fred and Jackie are arguing, Roseanne is there, and the baby starts crying]  Aw, baby, what's the matter?

  Roseanne Conner : What do you mean, "what's the matter"? Can't you imagine how scary this is to him? Where - the big, fuzzy thing is yelling at the milk machine?

• Roseanne Conner : What're you thinking, Jackie, you think a guy wants to find out that his girlfriend slept with 20 times more people than he did?

• Jackie Harris : [to Fred, cynically]  I slept with 60 men, most of them separately.

  Roseanne Conner : [coming in]  I can vouch for that, I was there that night selling tickets.

• Jackie Harris : [after revealing she slept with 60 guys while Fred only slept with 3 women]  Why does it matter to a guy if the woman has more experience?

  Roseanne Conner : Because then he knows that she knows that he is not very good.

  Jackie Harris : Fred's good, he's really good, especially considering it's *just* the three.

• Dan Conner : My mom's in the hospital.

  Roseanne Conner : Oh my God. Is she gonna be okay?

  Dan Conner : Yeah, I guess so.

  Roseanne Conner : I mean, did she have an accident or something?

  Dan Conner : It's not that kind of hospital.

  Roseanne Conner : What do you mean?

  Dan Conner : I got there and she was sitting out in the rain. I don't think she even knew who I was. The doctor thought she might be a danger to herself so he had her committed.