The Office (TV Series)
Diversity Day (2005)
Rainn Wilson: Dwight Schrute
Photos
Quotes
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Mr. Brown : Now this is a simple acronym: H.E.R.O. At Diversity, we believe it's very easy to be a hero. All you need are: Honesty, Empathy, Respect, and Open-mindedness.
Dwight Schrute : Excuse me, I'm sorry, but that's not all it takes to be a hero.
Mr. Brown : Okay, well, what is a hero to you?
Dwight Schrute : A hero kills people, people that wish him harm. A hero is part human and part supernatural. A hero is born out of a childhood trauma, or out of a disaster, and must be avenged.
Mr. Brown : Uh, okay, you're thinking of a superhero.
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Dwight Schrute : [Diversity Day exercise; Dwight has a card on his head that says "Asian"] "Lots of cultures eat rice" doesn't help me.
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Dwight Schrute : [deleted scene] I am a salesman, okay? And I don't think we should be doing this during prime sales hours. If you can prove to me that diversity is going to help my sales, I'll go elephant running with James Earl Jones. I really will, but not on spec.
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Dwight Schrute : [deleted scene] What are you doing?
Jim Halpert : Freecell.
Dwight Schrute : Solitaire is a one-player game. It can't have two players.
Jim Halpert : Well, I mean...
Dwight Schrute : What's your win rate?
Pam Beesley : Seventy-six percent. What's yours?
Dwight Schrute : You're not allowed to play two-player. You need to start over.
Pam Beesley : You're doing fine.
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Jim Halpert : [deleted scene] Um, what's going on here?
Pam Beesley : People treat us like the race on our forehead. And then we guess what race we are.
Jim Halpert : Ah, good. Good luck. Doing good.
[goes to the index cards and writes another race down]
Dwight Schrute : Oh, man, am I a woman?
Jim Halpert : Yes, yes.
Dwight Schrute : God!
Jim Halpert : How embarrassing is it? That's not fair. Here...
Dwight Schrute : It's not fair.
Jim Halpert : Try this.
[takes Dwight's 'Asian' race and switches it with the one he wrote]
Dwight Schrute : Thank you. Thank you very much.
Jim Halpert : Go get 'em.
Dwight Schrute : Good.
[clears throat]
Dwight Schrute : So, am I a hunter gather culture?
Pam Beesley : No.
Dwight Schrute : Do I live near a harbor or an ocean?
Pam Beesley : No.
Dwight Schrute : No, I'm an inland. Am I a mountainous?
Pam Beesley : No.
Dwight Schrute : Am I nomadic?
Pam Beesley : No.
Dwight Schrute : Okay, okay, okay, okay. I think I got this. Um, I am treated in a foreign way with a great deal of prejudice. Am I one of those tribes in Africa? The piggies, or whatever?
Pam Beesley : No.
Dwight Schrute : No. But I am, I am human, right?
[Pam hesitates, Dwight's new race is 'Dwight']
Dwight Schrute : I could be French.
[takes his 'Dwight' race off his forehead]
Dwight Schrute : Damn it, Jim! That's not funny, Jim!
Michael Scott : Oh, okay. Here we go, breakthrough radar. What happened? What happened here?
Pam Beesley : It didn't have anything to do with race.
Michael Scott : Okay, all right. Let's keep on track. Keep on point. Let's do it.