Never the Twain (TV Series)
Families at War (1981)
Frank Vincent: Auctioneer
Photos
Quotes
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Simon Peel : [walking towards an open chest and picking up an African Tribal mask] This would suit you perfectly. Every home should have one - a family portrait!
[Simon hands the mask to Oliver and walks away, just as the auctioneer appears]
Auctioneer : [Iidicating the mask] I'll let you have that cheap, governor, fiver, on account it's *supposed* to have a curse on it.
Oliver Smallbridge : Curse? Can you deliver it?
Auctioneer : Certainly.
Oliver Smallbridge : [handing the mask to the Auctioneer] Done - to Simon Peel!
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Auctioneer : Lot 12, A Chinese vase.
Simon Peel : [looks around] 30 pounds.
Oliver Smallbridge : 40.
Simon Peel : 50.
Oliver Smallbridge : 60.
Simon Peel : You're wasting your time, you know. Its a fake.
[Simon turns towards the Auctioneer]
Simon Peel : 70.
Oliver Smallbridge : 80.
Simon Peel : 90.
Oliver Smallbridge : 100.
Auctioneer : 100.
Simon Peel : You're just trying to be difficult. 150.
Oliver Smallbridge : 200 pounds.
Auctioneer : 200 pounds I'm bid now. Any advance on 200? Going for 200.
[bangs gavel]
Auctioneer : Gone. Sold, Smallbridge. Give it to him.
Oliver Smallbridge : [taking the vase in his hands] Don't feel too badly about it, Peel. You can't win em all.
Simon Peel : No, but you can win some of them.
[Simon points to the vase]
Simon Peel : You know, considering that it *is* a fake, I didn't think I'd get such a good price for it.