- Middle-Aged Drink Girl: They think 'cause I'm a woman I'm supposed to be "Miss Merry Sunshine". Well the hell with that!
- Luanne Platter: I had no idea you were a woman.
- Camera man: Excuse me. Is it safe to assume that you won't be purchasing a video of your dolphin encounter.
- Peggy Hill: He is a mammal and would have mammalian organs roughly in proportion to body size, I'm guessing?
- Hank Hill: Ugh, that's enough talkin' about it, for now.
- Hank Hill: I want to see to it that no one has to go through what I went through... except for a female dolphin.
- Luanne Platter: Can I send in the video to "When Animals Attack" now?
- Hank Hill: I don't think so.
- Luanne Platter: We could split the money.
- Hank Hill: That's not necessary.
- Luanne Platter: I can have it all?
- Hank Hill: Luanne, give me the tape.
- Luanne Platter: I already sent it in. I thought you'd say yes.
- Bill Dauterive: [after Hank freaks out when a catfish jumps on his lap reminding him of the dolphin incident] It was an ugly fish, I got a little scared too.
- Hank Hill: It was the dolphin. He uh attacked me.
- Peggy Hill: Hmm. I see.
- Hank Hill: No, it was more than that. He uh, remember the movie on Lifetime, you know, what Gregory Harrison did to Valerie Bertinelli?
- Peggy Hill: Oh my God! Oh I have never... well actually, I have had a dog hump my leg.