Kate: Hmmmmm what happened to that great cologne you had on yesterday?
Doug Heffernan: Oh decided not to wear it today. Went back to my old midnight steel.
Kate: Oh yeah. My dad wears that.
Deacon Palmer: You're not wearing the DiMali anymore?
Doug Heffernan: Naw you know what? Carrie didn't like it.
Deacon Palmer: Well if the scent's up for grabs I'll take it.
Doug Heffernan: It's all yours man enjoy it.
Danny Heffernan: Ho-hooooo boy. When I was married we had our own troubles but... .my wife never told me how to smell.
Doug Heffernan: No she was too busy taking naps with the gardener.
Danny Heffernan: Ok she wasn't taking naps with the gardener ok? She was taking naps with the landscaper. Gardener was a lookout.
Deacon Palmer: Sorry Carrie banned the DiMali from you but hey your loss is my gain.
Danny Heffernan: And he wasn't just a landscaper. He was a licensed contractor.
Doug Heffernan: Whoa whoa whoa. Ok Carrie doesn't ban me from things ok? I decide.
Deacon Palmer: Ok so one day you woke up and decided to throw out your PlayStation?
Doug Heffernan: No that was Carrie but... ..she was right I was headed for some serious thumb trouble.
Danny Heffernan: And what about the football pool, the go-kart and your... red cowboy boots?
Doug Heffernan: Love those boots... .
Deacon Palmer: And you loved your mustache.
Doug Heffernan: Yeah. Oh my god little by little she's been... ..been taking over my world.
Deacon Palmer: It's not really little by little it's more like big decisive chunks.
Doug Heffernan: How long you guys been knowing this is going on?
Deacon Palmer: I don't know it's been about what? 10 years this Friday?
Doug Heffernan: Well I'll tell you something. Alright it ends here. Sorry man but I'm taking my scent back. And I'm going home right now... to take my life back. Right after I finish my wings.