I Love Lucy (TV Series)

Lucy Tells the Truth (1953)

Desi Arnaz: Ricky Ricardo

Quotes 

• Ricky Ricardo : Why din't you just tell them the truth?

  Lucy Ricardo : You can't tell people the truth, they think you're lying. You have to lie to make them think you're telling the truth.

• Lucy Ricardo : You think you know all there is to know about me, don't you? Remind me some time to tell you about my experience in musical comedy. Come on, Ethel, let's get some coffee.

  Ricky Ricardo : Hey, just a minute. You were in musical comedy?

  Lucy Ricardo : It was before I met you, Dear. Come on, Ethel.

  Ricky Ricardo : Now wait. wait a minute. This is very interestin'. What was the name of the musical comedy?

  Ethel Mertz : Oh, leave her alone, Ricky. She's just exaggerating, as usual.

  Lucy Ricardo : [righteously indignant]  I am not.

  Ricky Ricardo : Well, what was the name of the musical comedy?

  Lucy Ricardo : Oklahoma!

  All together : [amazed]  Oklahoma?

  Lucy Ricardo : Oklahoma! And I was the star, too.

  Ethel Mertz : Yeah? What was your maiden name, Alfred Drake?

  Lucy Ricardo : [backpedaling]  Well, maybe I wasn't exactly a star, but would you believe I was a featured player? Chorus girl? Ticket taker?

  Ricky Ricardo : Lucy, why don't you tell the truth. You know that you were never in Oklahoma!

  Lucy Ricardo : I was too. I spent two weeks in Tulsa once.

• Ethel Mertz : [the Mertzes are telling the Ricardos stories of their days in vaudeville]  Hey, Fred, do you remember what happened to that quick-change artist? You know the one who used to change her clothes, in the dark, right out on the stage?

  Fred Mertz : Do I? Boy, was she ever mad at that electrician!

  Ricky Ricardo : What happened?

  Ethel Mertz : Well, she called for her *tights* and he thought she said lights!