Home Improvement (TV Series)

When Harry Kept Dolores (1996)

Tim Allen: Tim Taylor

Quotes 

• Tim : Harry is acting like this is the greatest thing that ever happened to him, but you know what? I'm not buying it. They argue a lot, yes, he loves her and deep down somewhere this guy is hurting.

  Jill : Oh my God.

  Tim : What happened?

  Jill : Did you just hear yourself? You've had an insight. And it was incredibly sensitive. Instead of taking Harry's behavior at face value, you looked deeper and saw his inner pain.

  Tim : I didn't mean to. I swear to God I didn't mean to.

• Al : I'm part owner and she makes me feel like a stock boy.

  Dolores : Hey stocky boy, run across the street and get me some hot tea.

  Tim : Yeah, stocky boy. Remember how she likes it: two sugars and a big lump of arsenic.

• Tim : The Mustang is in the shop and I'm driving Jill's Nomad. I hate driving her car. I get in there, of course, no gas, hasn't been washed in three months, cookie crumbs on the front seat. Why can't she take care of her car? How simple would it be...

  Dolores : Could it be she's a tad busy going to school, raising three kids, and making sure you have a nice house to come home to?

  Tim : Could be.

• Jill : You know what this means, don't you? You're evolving.

  Tim : I am not and you take that back.

• Tim : Harry, you've been married 25 years, Man, you gotta feel a little bad about this break up.

  Harry : You're right, Tim, I do feel bad - that it didn't happen 24 years ago.