Home Improvement (TV Series)
Ploys for Tots (1998)
Patricia Richardson: Jill Taylor
Quotes
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Gracie Taylor : [the girls get Spice Girls dolls for their birthday from Tim and Jill] I got Posh Spice!
Claire Taylor : [disappointed] I got Sporty Spice. I want Posh Spice.
Jill : But you love Sporty Spice. You were Sporty Spice for Halloween.
Claire Taylor : I want Posh Spice!
Gracie Taylor : But they gave me Posh Spice.
Tim : Upstairs, I got some Old Spice.
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Marty Taylor : Jill, the girls' birthday cake is great. What's your secret?
Jill : Gretchen's Bakery. It's that place with the flashing neon lederhosen.
Tim : You know, I always thought Gretchen was selling something else there.
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Jill : Can you believe what Marty just did?
Tim : No. Buying these bikes off the rack like this? These gear ratios and tires. You'll never get any speed out of these puppies.
Jill : I'm not talking about the bikes. I'm talking about the way he's dealing with the girls.
Tim : He's just trying to make her happy.
Jill : Yeah. At her sister's expense. He's not doing Claire any favors by giving in to her. He's letting her just take control.
Tim : This is none of our business.
Jill : Yes, it is.
Tim : No, it's not. We don't know anything about raising two girls.
Jill : Excuse me, someone in this room was a girl once.
Tim : That was years ago before the operation.
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Jill : Children need boundaries and Marty's not setting any. He lets them stay up as long as they want every night.
Tim : Jill...
Jill : He's not setting any limits on what kind of television they watch.
Tim : He's doing the best job he can. He's going through a separation. For God's sake, the guy can't be with his girls on his birthday. He's counting Snausages.
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Jill : [about Claire] Marty, you're setting up a behavioral pattern where you give in to her every time she acts out.
Marty Taylor : Oh, spare me the psychobabble. I know how to handle my kids.
Jill : If you knew how to handle your kids, they'd know how to behave in our home.
Tim : You know, ice cream is starting to sound real good right now.
Jill : Look, Claire and Gracie need the security of knowing that there is a grown-up in control.
Marty Taylor : That's okay. Just don't tell me how to raise my kids.
Tim : How about Rocky Road?