- Hedonism Bot: Less reality, more fantasy. Resume the opera.
- Fry: But I can't play anymore.
- Dr. Zoidberg: Yes, you can! The music was in your heart, not your hands.
- [Fry plays off key, everyone boos]
- Dr. Zoidberg: Your music's bad, and you should feel bad!
- The Robot Devil: Your lyrics lack subtility! You can't just have your characters announce how they feel! That makes me feel angry!
- Bender: [singing, reading from a dictionary] "The use of words expressing something other than their literal intention." / Now that *is* irony!
- Bender: Sure, I can help you, but we might have to metaphorically make a deal with the devil, and by "devil", I mean Robot Devil, and by "metaphorically", I mean get your coat.
- Beelzebot, The Robot Devil: Hello, Fry. Muahahahaha! Just dropped by to make sure you're as happy with our little deal as I am... oh, give me back my hands! These things are always touching me in... places.
- Fry: Heheheh, yeah, they get around.
- [Robot Devil appears]
- Bender: What up?
- Beelzebot, The Robot Devil: Oh. Well it so happens that I'm in the mood to make a deal with you.
- Bender: Forget it. You can't tempt me.
- Beelzebot, The Robot Devil: Really? There's nothing you want?
- Bender: Hmm. I forgot you could tempt me with things I want.
- Fry: My hands! My horrible human hands! Whoa! And what'd you do to my nails?
- The Robot Devil: I cleaned them.
- Fry: [singing] Destiny has cheated me / By forcing me / to decide upon / The Woman that I idolize / And the hands of an, Automaton /... Without these hands / I can't complete / The opera that was captivating her / But if I keep them / And she marries him / Then he probably won't / Want me dating her...
- [during Fry's opera]
- Professor Hubert Farnsworth: I can't believe the devil is so unforgiving.
- Dr. Zoidberg: I can't believe everybody's just ad-libbing!
- Beelzebot, The Robot Devil: [Robot Devil jumps out of the refrigerator] Bender! What a surprise! For you. Finding me in the refrigerator.
- Bender: Well, at least I don't have the hiccups any more, what's up?
- Bender: Wow, your kid is great. How hard did you say you had to hit him?
- Mrs. Mellonger: Well, fairly hard.
- Beelzebot, The Robot Devil: [after Bender's airhorn deafens Leela] How delightfully ironic.
- Bender: It's not ironic, it's just mean. Take this!
- [blows horn, but it falters]
- Beelzebot, The Robot Devil: Out of aerosol. Also ironic.
- Bender: Oh, yeah? Well, bite my shiny, metal...
- [realizes he gave up his crotch plate]
- Bender: Ohhh, noooooo!
- Beelzebot, The Robot Devil: [singing] I will marry her now and confine her to Hell / How droll! How droll! / Where Styx is a river, and not just a band / Though they'll play the reception if all goes as planned / Unless, Fry, you surrender... my hands!
- TV Annoucement: Yes, now you can hear holophonor virtuoso Philip Fry play 900 of his classic themes in your own home on this two-record set. That's over 30 minutes of music for only $14.99.
- Dr. Zoidberg: Only $14.99 for a two-record set. Two records! Oh, Zoidberg, at last you're becoming a crafty consumer! Hello? I'll take eight!
- [while watching an actor playing him in Fry's Opera]
- Bender: I don't remember ever fighting Godzilla... But that is so what I would have done!
- Leela: I've been a fool. A fully justified, prudent fool.
- [touches Fry's hands]
- Leela: Aaah! They're so cold!
- Beelzebot, The Robot Devil: [off screen] And yet hell is so hot!
- [laughs evilly]
- Beelzebot, The Robot Devil: Can I have my hands back now?
- Fry: No!
- Beelzebot, The Robot Devil: [off screen] You're not nice!
- Hedonism Bot: Ah, Fry, congratulations. Your latest performance was as delectable as dipping my bottom over and over into a bath of the silkiest oils and creams.
- Fry: Thank you, sir. That's exactly what I was going for.
- Hedonism Bot: You were the sole diversion in what has been a pale and unamusing season, and so I would fain commission you write an opera.
- Fry: But I've never written an opera.
- Hedonism Bot: And I've never heard one. Still, if you can keep me amused through the overture I shall consider it a smashing success.
- Hedonism Bot: Let us cavort like the Greeks of old!
- [lowers voice]
- Hedonism Bot: You know the ones I mean.
- Fry: At last, I have the power to make Leela love me!
- [the Devil's hands start strangling Fry]
- Beelzebot, The Robot Devil: Oh, sorry. That'll wear off in a couple of days.
- Fry: [singing] Destiny/ has cheated me/ By forcing me/ to decide upon/ The Woman that I idolize/ Or the hands of an Automaton/... Without these hands/ I can't complete/ The opera that/ was captivating her/ But if I keep them/ And she marries him/ Then he probably won't/ Want me dating her...
- Fry: [the wheel lands on Robot Devil, much to his horror] Robot Devil? I get your hands? Zam!
- Beelzebot, The Robot Devil: Oh, what an appallingly ironic outcome!
- Bender: It's not ironic, it's just coincidental. Now fork over those lady-fingers, Cookie!
- Beelzebot, The Robot Devil: Your lyrics lack subtlety! You can't just have your characters announce how they feel! That makes me feel angry!
- TV Advertisement: Yes, now you can hear holophonor virtuoso Philip Fry play 900 of his classic themes in your own home on this two-record set. That's over 30 minutes of music for only $14.99.
- Dr. Zoidberg: Only $14.99 for a two-record set. Two records! Oh, Zoidberg, at last you're becoming a crafty consumer! Hello? I'll take eight!
- Reverend Preacherbot: By the power vested in me by the state of New New York...
- Fry: No! Stop! Take my hands, you evil... metal... dork!