Futurama (TV Series)

A Tale of Two Santas (2001)

David Herman: Mayor C. Randall Poopenmeyer, Elves, Father

Quotes 

• Little Girl : Mommy, mommy! Santa's through the perimeter!

  Mother : This is it, kids! Take your suicide pills so you won't suffer!

  Bender : No, wait! I'm the good Santa! I've got toys at very reasonable prices!

  Father : Don't listen to him! He's the father of all lies, and the uncle of all tricks!

  Bender : But I come bearing Tri-Ominos!

  Mother : Go for the shins!

• Mayor C. Randall Poopenmeyer : As soon as I pull this switch, these powerful electromagnets will tear you limb from limb, killing you in the most humane possible manner.

  Bender : But Mr. Mayor, that doesn't sound humane.

  Mayor C. Randall Poopenmeyer : It is for the witnesses, because it's not boring.