Freaks and Geeks (TV Series)

Discos and Dragons (2000)

Martin Starr: Bill Haverchuck

Quotes 

• Bill Haverchuck : He thinks being the Dungeon Master gives him the license to mess with our heads.

  Harris Trinsky : Oh, I'm Sorry. Perhaps I should let you encounter kittens and grandmas so as not to upset you.

• Mr. Fleck : Oh hey you guys. Sorry about the smoke. These things are gonna kill me. I know I look cool with a cigarette in my hand, but remember it's just a crutch. Don't forget that. Got it?

  Bill Haverchuck : Yes Mr. Fleck.

  Mr. Fleck : How's tricks?

  Bill Haverchuck : We got cleaned out.

  Mr. Fleck : Jocks?

  Sam Weir : Yeah, who else?

  Mr. Fleck : Let me tell you something about the jocks. Take a seat fellas. Watch my hand. This is a graph of their lives. Oo, I'm in pee wee football. I'm pretty good. What? I can be first string on a high school team? I get to wear a jacket with leather sleeves? Hooray! Now right there, where they cleaned you out, that's the pinnacle of their lives. Hey, I wanna play college ball. What? My GPA's not high enough to get a sports scholarship? Ow, I just blew my knee out during practice? Oops, I'm out of school, and selling used cars. What? I'm fired? Hand me that bottle of booze, man. Now, let's take at your life, shall we? You get called geeks, you get cleaned out, girls don't even look at you.

  Bill Haverchuck : I thought that this was supposed to make us feel better?

  Mr. Fleck : Hold on cool breeze, it gets better. What? I get accepted at an Ivy League college? Hey, chicks dig smart guys, who know? Woah, look at me, I'm head of a Fortune 500 company. And yes, Mr jock who cleaned me out, I will have fries with that.

  Sam Weir : Wait, no, that's a long time from now. We have to put up with this for another 3 years.

  Mr. Fleck : That's why you have to learn to enjoy the simple pleasures of life.

  [Puts film cartridge on table. Students gather round] 

  Mr. Fleck : .

  Harris Trinsky : A 16mm print of Monty Python and the Holy Grail?

  Mr. Fleck : Yep. The guys at AV at Lincoln got it on loan from the air force base, so I traded them a copy of Hemo the Magnificent. It's ours. For a week.

  Neal Schweiber : AV is paradise on earth.

  Bill Haverchuck : I'm so happy I think I'm gonna cry.