Frasier (TV Series)

A Passing Fancy (2001)

Brian Klugman: Kirby

Quotes 

• Roz Doyle : Let's get something straight. If you get drunk, the evening is over. And if you fondle, massage or cup any portion of my body the evening is over. Got it?

  Kirby : Man, you're like a total prude, huh?

  Roz Doyle : Yes, I am.

• Dr. Frasier Crane : Kirby! Did you do any reading this week?

  Kirby : Sort of.

  Dr. Frasier Crane : What does "sort of" mean?

  Kirby : No.

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Right. Why not?

  Kirby : 'Cause it's a bunch of junk I'm never gonna need to know.

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Yes, Kirby, this "junk", as you call it, may seem unimportant to you now, but knowing something about where we came from may help you to decide where you wish to go. Now, let's start learning about history, lest you be condemned to repeat it.

  [He slides the book over to Kirby] 

  Kirby : Continue reading until your mother gets here.

• Maitre'D : Would any one of you like a drink?

  Kirby : Yes. The lady and I will have the Coca Cola.

  Roz Doyle : Yeah, make sure the lady's has a lot of Jack Daniels in it.

• Kirby : You never said there was gonna be pop quizzes.

  Dr. Frasier Crane : That's the "pop" part.