Jaleel White credited as playing...
Steve Urkel
- Steve Urkel: To be quite honest, Fuffner; I'd written you off as being incorrigible.
- Willie Fuffner: What did he say?
- Waldo: He called you a gerbil.
- Steve Urkel: Aaah! Aaaah!
- Rachel Crawford: It's okay, Steve. I'm here.
- Steve Urkel: I know! You're standing on my finger!
- [Steve is wasted]
- Laura: Steve...
- Steve Urkel: Laura! Oh, you're a sore for sight eyes!
- Laura: Are you all right?
- Steve Urkel: Swell, punch! I want more punch! Anybody have more punch?
- Laura: Steve, calm down!
- Steve Urkel: [as Waldo hands Steve a cup of the spiked punch] Why should I Laura? I'm the pife of the larty!
- [splashes Waldo with the spiked punch]
- Steve Urkel: [Steve is still wasted] Ooh the Durkel!
- Laura: Waldo, what's with Steve? He's acting weird, even for him!
- Waldo: Willie told me not to tell.
- Laura: Tell what?
- Waldo: That he spiked Urkel's punch.
- Laura: WHAT?
- Waldo: I said he... Hey, you can't trick me!
- Steve Urkel: Come on everybody, let's ooh the durkel!
- [Steve climbs on the ledge of the roof]
- Rachel Crawford: Steve! Steve! Get down from there!
- Steve Urkel: Hey, you gotta get up if want to get dow... oh...
- [guests scream as Steve falls off the edge of the roof]
- Steve Urkel: Help! Help!
- Laura: Steve, are you okay?
- Steve Urkel: [Hanging on a ledge] I've fallen and I can't get up!
- Steve Urkel: Rachel, what are you doing?
- Rachel Crawford: Tightrope walking.
- Steve Urkel: Do you know how to do that?
- Rachel Crawford: No.