Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV Series)

Never Kill a Boy on the First Date (1997)

Sarah Michelle Gellar: Buffy Summers

Photos 

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Quotes 

• Rupert Giles : All right. I'll just jump into my time machine, go back to the 12th century and ask the vampires to postpone their ancient prophecy for a few days while you take in dinner and a show.

  Buffy Summers : Okay, at this point, you're abusing sarcasm.

• Xander Harris : [in the cafeteria]  So, Buffy, how'd the slaying go last night?

  Buffy Summers : Xander!

  Xander Harris : I mean, how'd the laying go? No, I don't mean that either.

• Rupert Giles : Buffy, maintaining a normal social life as a Slayer... i-i-is problematic at best.

  Buffy Summers : This is the '90s, the 1990s, in point of fact, and I can do both. Clark Kent has a job. I just want to go on a date.

  Rupert Giles : Well, I suppose it was a fairly slim lead.

  Buffy Summers : Thank you, thank you, thank you. And, look, I won't go far, okay? If the apocalypse comes, beep me.

• Buffy Summers : We don't even know if this is anything.

  Rupert Giles : Well, no, we don't.

  Buffy Summers : And I haven't had a day off for a while.

  Rupert Giles : True.

  Buffy Summers : And a cranky Slayer is a careless Slayer.

• Rupert Giles : If your identity as a Slayer is revealed, it could put you and all those around you in grave danger.

  Buffy Summers : Well, in that case, I won't wear my button that says "I'm a Slayer. Ask Me How."

• Buffy Summers : What happened?

  Rupert Giles : Uh, two more of the brethren came in here. They came after me. But I was more than a match for them.

  Buffy Summers : Meaning?

  Rupert Giles : I hid.

• [after Buffy slays a vampire, Giles picks up a ring off the ground] 

  Buffy Summers : Oh. That's great. I kill 'em. You fence their stuff.

• Angel : I was hoping I'd find you here.

  Buffy Summers : You were?

  Angel : Some serious stuff happening tonight. You need to be out there.

  Buffy Summers : No. Not you, too.

  Angel : What do you know?

  Buffy Summers : Prophecy, Anointed One, yadda, yadda, yadda.

  Angel : So you know. Fine. I just thought I'd warn you.

  Buffy Summers : Warn me? You see that guy over there at the bar? He came here to be with me.

  Angel : You're here on a date?

  Buffy Summers : Yes. Why is it such a shock to everyone?

• Rupert Giles : I was 10-years-old when my father told me I was destined to be a Watcher. He was one and his, uh, mother before him, and I-I was to be next.

  Buffy Summers : Were you thrilled beyond all measure?

  Rupert Giles : No. I had very definite plans about my future. I was going to be a fighter pilot... or possibly a grocer, well, uh, my father gave me a very tiresome speech about, uh, responsibility and sacrifice.

• Rupert Giles : What do you want?

  Owen Thurman : A book.

  Rupert Giles : Oh.

  Buffy Summers : [to Giles]  See, this is a school, and we have students, and they check out books, and then they learn things.

  Rupert Giles : I was beginning to suspect that was a myth.

• Rupert Giles : That symbol on the ring... I believe it's the rune for fidelity, but, uh, it doesn't connect with any of the sects that I've studied.

  Buffy Summers : What about this? On the inside, it's a sun and three stars. Haven't we seen that somewhere?

  Rupert Giles : Let me see... No, I-I-I don't think this, um, represents any...

  Buffy Summers : Wait, it's right here. Sun and three stars. Yecch. Check these guys out. Told you it looked familiar.

  Rupert Giles : Oh, the Order of Aurelius. Yes, you're right.

  Buffy Summers : Ooh, two points for the Slayer, while the Watcher has yet to score.

• [first lines] 

  Buffy Summers : [to a vampire]  We haven't been properly introduced. I'm Buffy, and you're history!

  [drives stake through his heart, and he turns to dust] 

• Buffy Summers : Okay, guy's opinion. Which one do you think Owen will like better... the red or the peach?

  Xander Harris : Oh, you mean for kissing you and then telling all his friends how easy you are so the whole school loses respect for you and then talks behind your back... The red's fine.

  Buffy Summers : Thanks. I'll go with the peach.

• Owen Thurman : I lost my Emily... Dickinson. It's dumb, but I like her around, kind of a security blanket.

  Buffy Summers : Oh, I have something like that. Oh, well, it's an actual blanket, uh, and I-I don't really carry it around anymo-more... So, Emily Dickens, huh? She's great.

  Owen Thurman : Dickinson.

  Buffy Summers : She's good also.

• Buffy Summers : Um, that was my hopeful ear. Could you repeat that?

• Rupert Giles : [boring nighttime stakeout]  Well, you know what they say. Ninety percent of the Slaying game is - is waiting.

  Buffy Summers : You couldn't have told me that ninety minutes ago?

• Rupert Giles : Another date? Don't you ever do anything else?

  Buffy Summers : This is the first date. There's never been a date, okay? This is my maiden voyage!

• Cordelia Chase : [sees Buffy dancing with Owen]  Isn't there laws against this sort of thing?

  [pushes her way through the crowd] 

  Cordelia Chase : Owen! Look at you here, all alone.

  Owen Thurman : Cordelia, I'm here with Buffy.

  Cordelia Chase : Oh. Okay. You wanna dance?

  Owen Thurman : No, I'm still here with Buffy.

  Cordelia Chase : You are so good to help the needy.

  Buffy Summers : Cordelia, Owen and I would like to be alone right now, and as it happens, you would have to go somewhere that's away.

  Cordelia Chase : [to Owen:]  Well, when you're ready for the big league, let me know.

  [goes on her way] 

• Buffy Summers : [Owen is down]  You killed my date!

  [and now she is really angry, and the vampire has to suffer!]