Blackadder the Third (TV Series)

Ink and Incapability (1987)

Hugh Laurie: The Prince Regent, their master

Photos 

Quotes 

• Prince George : Ah, Dr. Johnson, damn cold day!

  Dr. Samuel Johnson : Indeed it is sir - but a very fine one, for I celebrated last night the encyclopedic implementation of my pre-meditated orchestration of demotic Anglo-Saxon.

  Prince George : Nope - didn't catch any of that.

  Dr. Samuel Johnson : Well, I simply observed, sir, that I'm felicitous since during the course of the penultimate solar sojourn, I terminated my uninterrupted categorisation of the vocabluary of our post-Norman tongue.

  Prince George : Well, I don't know what you're talking about, but it sounds damn saucy, you lucky thing! I know some fairly liberal-minded girls, but I've never penultimated any of them in a solar sojourn, or for that matter, been given any Norman tongue.

  Blackadder : I believe, sir, that the Doctor is trying to tell you that he is happy because he has finished his book. It has apparently taken him ten years.

  Prince George : Well, I'm a slow reader myself.

• [about the dictionary] 

  Blackadder : No, sir, it is not. It's the most pointless book since How To Learn French was translated into French.

  Prince George : You haven't got anything personal against Johnson, have you Blackadder?

  Blackadder : Good Lord, sir, not at all. In fact, I had never heard of him until you mentioned him just now.

  Prince George : But you do think he's a genius...?

  Blackadder : No, sir, I do not. Unless, of course, the definition of "genius" in his ridiculous Dictionary is "a fat dullard or wobblebottom; a pompous ass with sweatly dewflaps".

  Prince George : Ha. close shave there, then. Lucky you warned me. I was about to embrace this unholy arse to the royal bosom.

  Blackadder : I'm delighted to have been instrumental of keeping your bosom free of arses, sir.

• Prince George : Someone said I had the wit and intellect of a donkey.

  Blackadder : Oh, an absurd suggestion sir, unless it was a particularly stupid donkey.

• Prince George : [wakes up agitated]  Oh, Blackadder. Blackadder!

  Blackadder : You called sir?

  Prince George : Wha- wha- what time is it?

  Blackadder : Three o'clock in the afternoon, your highness.

  Prince George : Oh, thank God for that, I thought I'd overslept.

• Prince George : [reading]  "Medium-sized insectivore with protruding nasal implement." Doesn't sound much like a bee to me!

  Blackadder : It's an aardvark your highness, can't you see that? It's a bloody aardvark!

• The Prince Regent, their master : Well, now look, Dr Johnson. I may be as thick as a whale omelette, but even I know a book's got to have a plot.

  Dr. Samuel Johnson, noted for his fat dictionary : Not this one, Sir. It is a book which tells you what English words mean.

  The Prince Regent, their master : I know what English words mean, I speak English. You must be a bit of a thicko.

  Dr. Samuel Johnson, noted for his fat dictionary : Perhaps you would rather not be patron of my book, if you can see no value in it whatsoever, Sir.

  The Prince Regent, their master : Well perhaps so, Sir, as it sounds to me as if my being patron of this complete cowpat of a book will set the seal once and for all on my reputation as an utter turnip-head.

  Dr. Samuel Johnson, noted for his fat dictionary : Oh, well it is a reputation well deserved, Sir. Farewell.

• Prince George : I'm as happy as a Frenchman who has just invented a pair of self-removing trousers.

• Prince George : Well, yes, you see, only the other day, Prime Minister Pitt called me an idle scrounger, and it wasn't until later that I thought how clever it would've been to have said, "Oh, bugger off, you old fart!"