Bam Margera credited as playing...
Self
- Bam Margera: Ape, I got a muffed-up ass butt!
- April Margera: I know, and you had the cutest butt ever and now you ruined it!
- Bam Margera: No, Dick Farm Dunn ruined it.
- [Bam has just been branded with a penis-shaped branding iron]
- Bam Margera: You gave me a hologram dick! There's three solid dicks, there's one half-assed one right here, and then you gave me a set of balls.
- Johnny Knoxville: But a sweet set of balls!
- Bam Margera: Rad... I'd rather rip my dick off and throw it in the river than to do that again. Goddamn!
- April Margera: [after seeing the brand on Bam's ass] You're going to have that for life!
- Bam Margera: No shit!
- Bam Margera: [after getting shot by riot explosive] I'm crying. I'm a fucking skateboarder and I'm getting shot.
- Bam Margera: [after the Yak Charge] That couldn't have gone any better. I didn't know Knoxville could do back flips.
- Johnny Knoxville: I'm Johnny Knoxville, and I'm going to the moon!
- Crew Member: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1!
- Bam Margera: Later!
- [Presses the launch button, causing Johnny Knoxville and the rocket to blast off and fall into the sea]
- Ryan Dunn: [Johnny Knoxville is about to be launched with the rocket] This isn't the best idea.
- Bam Margera: Yes it is...
- Bam Margera: [Johnny Knoxville is about to be launched in the air] I'm scared just watching him, I want a Lance helmet!
- Bam Margera: It's time to play a game with a bunch of these medicine balls, and they're heavy as shit!
- Bam Margera: So the guys think they're coming here for a photo shoot, but little do they know we've got a shitload of bees we're gonna put through the sunroof and we've rigged the locks so they can't get out.
- Johnny Knoxville: And when they do get out, we got some marbles waiting for them.
- Bam Margera: This is the Beehive Limo.
- Bam Margera: We're here at April and Phil's house and I'm gonna present them the branded dick on my butt. No let me rephrase that - DICKS!
- Bam Margera: The boys think they're arriving for a photo shoot, but little do they know we've got a shitload of bees we're gonna put through the sunroof, and we've rigged the locks so they cant get out.
- Johnny Knoxville: And when they do get out we've got some marbles waiting for 'em.
- Bam Margera: This is the Beehive Limo.