Fanboys (2009)
Jay Baruchel: Windows
Photos
Quotes
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Windows : You guys both got to stop perpetuating this myth that Boba Fett is some kind of bad-ass. All right? He has a jet pack. So did the Rocketeer. Really cool. When it comes time for battle, the man's Michael Bay - all style, no substance.
Hutch : If you diss the Fett the again, I will corn-hole you with a lightsaber!
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Windows : Harrison Ford is the greatest actor of all time!
Eric : In the history of cinema?
Windows : He's Han Solo, Indiana Jones. Yes!
Eric : Deckard from Blade Runner.
Windows : Yes. Exactly. Greatest actor of all time. He's never done a bad movie.
[the van drives by a billboard for the 1998 movie "Six Days, Seven Nights"]
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Hutch : Rule number one: In my van, it's Rush. All Rush, all the time. No exceptions. Rule number two: Nobody touch the red button. And I mean never touch the red button. Most importantly, rule number three: There's no jerking it in my van!
Windows : [throwing up his hands] Fine...
Hutch : [amid laughter] Don't roll your eyes at ME, Admiral Jackbar!
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Admiral Seasholtz : Okay. Hilarious, everyone. Looks like we got more Lucas hounds here to mock Roddenberry. Congratulations, gentleman, but I would like to see your Darth Vader take on one Borg drone. And we'll see who's laughing then. Am I right?
Windows : Darth Vader can put the entire Borg collective in a vice grip with his mind.
Admiral Seasholtz : Uh, Darth Vader has asthma, so name me one Star Trek character with a respiratory disease, 'cause I'm drawing a blank.
Linus : Name me one Star Wars character who's gay.
Hutch : Beside's you.
Admiral Seasholtz : Well, no one's gay in Star Trek, so why would I even do that?
Linus : Captain Picard.
Admiral Seasholtz : Okay. Captain Picard is not gay. He's British.
Windows : [in a swishy voice] Come on. "Make it so!"
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Windows : I met her in a Jedi chatroom. The woman is perfect. She's intelligent and acerbic, and a die-hard fan. She's even got connections inside the Lucas camp.
Linus : Who's also got a man package and a goatee.
Windows : You guys are all just jealous because she describes herself as a cross between Sarah Michelle Gellar and Janeane Garafolo.
Hutch : Tell 'em how you described yourself.
Windows : I was perfectly honest with her.
Linus : You said you look like a white Billy Dee Williams. You called yourself white chocolate.
Windows : I *am* white chocolate.
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Head Of Security : Mr. Lucas is touched and mildly flattered by what have done here. And I have been informed that I feel the same way. So the charges are gonna be dropped. That is, of course, if you are what you appear to be.
Windows : Uh, what do we appear to be?
Head Of Security : Fanboys. Something we can easily determine with a simple quiz.
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Hutch : I'm telling you, man. I took that Vulcan down hard. I rolled him into the dirt like he was my frickin tauntaun.
Eric : Tauntaun, my ass. If it wasn't for me, you guys would all be dead.
Windows : What fight were you watching? I was channeling the emperor.
Linus : The emperor? I don't remember the emperor crapping his robe and screaming "time-out."
Eric : Oh, my God. That's right.
Windows : There is such a thing as time-out.
Hutch : [imitating The Emperor] I can feel your anger growing inside. Wait. Time-out.