Avril Lavigne, or "April's vineyard", is the most accomplished guitar-player in the known universe. Her plinka-plonka style of string-picking has spread like wildfire, having previously been unknown to the music world. However, this modest girl who gives 99% of all her earnings to charities takes no credit for it! Her vocals, which do NOT in any way resemble all the other 21st-century pop girlies, have the kind of range that lesser talents like Bjork and Kate Bush can only dream about. Her tough-as-nails punk-rock attitude is totally real hence she offers more street credibility than all of the members of Sex Pistols put together. When Avril gets drunk in pubs, and then says "f*ck off" to the paparazzis - while pointing her tiny middle finger in the air - it is like nothing less than poetry, but street poetry, coming straight from the gutter. This working-class girl comes from a humble mining town with a population of 25. Her toughness is genuine and raw, and if you think that a 5-foot-2, 80-pound girl can't be tough then you got another thing coming!
But all of that pales in comparison to the song-writing abilities of this spring chicken. "Sk8er Boi" is the song of a whole generation, the lyrics focusing on the intellectual sub-culture of skaters, who are modern-day gladiators in the truest sense of the word, zits and all. In "The Bonez Tour" she sings this song with the passion of a limp goat - and I do mean this in the nicest way possible. There is something about her voice that is almost sheepinian... Anyone who watches this DVD will be thrilled to know that "My Happy Ending" is on it, too, being the unforgettable piece of crap that it is. (If you look up "crap" in the dictionary you'll find that it means "divine music" in the language of the Pipito Indians.) But what concert, especially when it's named "Bonez" with a "Z", could be complete without her generic breakthrough hit, "Complicated"? The song title says it all: a 4-foot-8, 44-pound mass of pure talent and brain-power that has even Einstein spinning in his coffin. She is so damn complicated! She really is! Like all tortured artists and geniuses, bursting with energy, cancelled tour dates and stolen songs.
I hope she releases more live DVDs like "Bonez" where her tremendous lack of stage presence and off-key singing can be on display for all to see and hear. And I very much hope that she continues naming her tours and DVDs after parts of the anatomy which are wrongly spelled. I suggest a "H-Art Tour" DVD next, or maybe "Kidneyz '08"? Maybe even a hit single called "Leave 'Er" as in "liver"? Maybe this could be the chorus: "Please, Sk8er Boi, leave 'er / Can't you see she's got a bad liver / My attitude is so punky / Please hit me with your spunky..." I know that Avril would never steal an idea, so I expect a call from her if she intends to use my lyrics for her next album. (I just hope they aren't too high-brow for her style...?) I would be so honoured!
But all of that pales in comparison to the song-writing abilities of this spring chicken. "Sk8er Boi" is the song of a whole generation, the lyrics focusing on the intellectual sub-culture of skaters, who are modern-day gladiators in the truest sense of the word, zits and all. In "The Bonez Tour" she sings this song with the passion of a limp goat - and I do mean this in the nicest way possible. There is something about her voice that is almost sheepinian... Anyone who watches this DVD will be thrilled to know that "My Happy Ending" is on it, too, being the unforgettable piece of crap that it is. (If you look up "crap" in the dictionary you'll find that it means "divine music" in the language of the Pipito Indians.) But what concert, especially when it's named "Bonez" with a "Z", could be complete without her generic breakthrough hit, "Complicated"? The song title says it all: a 4-foot-8, 44-pound mass of pure talent and brain-power that has even Einstein spinning in his coffin. She is so damn complicated! She really is! Like all tortured artists and geniuses, bursting with energy, cancelled tour dates and stolen songs.
I hope she releases more live DVDs like "Bonez" where her tremendous lack of stage presence and off-key singing can be on display for all to see and hear. And I very much hope that she continues naming her tours and DVDs after parts of the anatomy which are wrongly spelled. I suggest a "H-Art Tour" DVD next, or maybe "Kidneyz '08"? Maybe even a hit single called "Leave 'Er" as in "liver"? Maybe this could be the chorus: "Please, Sk8er Boi, leave 'er / Can't you see she's got a bad liver / My attitude is so punky / Please hit me with your spunky..." I know that Avril would never steal an idea, so I expect a call from her if she intends to use my lyrics for her next album. (I just hope they aren't too high-brow for her style...?) I would be so honoured!
