- Charlie Baker: You wanna go for a walk or something?
- Anne Murtaugh: Is Charlie Baker asking me out on a date?
- Charlie Baker: [unsure about it, because both dads are enemies] I'm not sure if our fathers would approve, but...
- Anne Murtaugh: [quietly] Let's go.
- Sarah Baker: Dad, we're gonna need a forklift for Lorraine's luggage.
- Lorraine Baker: What? I've only been here 30 seconds and you're already making fun of me.
- Sarah Baker: Yeah, that was my foot.
- Sarah Baker: Is this whole suitcase just for makeup?
- Lorraine Baker: Whatever, butch.
- [from trailer]
- Kate 'Mom' Baker: Honey, you actually bought that shirt?
- Tom Baker: Hey, every dad is entitled to one hideous shirt and one horrible sweater. It's part of The Dad Code.
- Lorraine Baker: You know how I feel about camping.
- Tom Baker: But we're staying in a house.
- Lorraine Baker: A house with no air conditioning. That makes it camping.
- Lorraine Baker: Still smells the same. Old gross stuff, dead animals, and murky lake water.
- Tom Baker: It's called fresh air, sweetie.
- Lorraine Baker: [after Sarah asks Lorraine for some makeup help] Now, let's start with some lip gloss.
- [Lorraine unleashes the lipgloss]
- Sarah Baker: PINK? Can't we put on, like, a skin color?
- Lorraine Baker: Hold still.
- [from trailer]
- Tom Baker: That's not gonna fit in your tent, Lorraine.
- Lorraine Baker: Oh, I'm gonna make it fit, Dad!
- Nigel Baker: Winnetka? That's my middle name.
- Kyle Baker: And Lake is mine.
- Tom Baker: That's because you were conceived there.
- Nigel Baker: What's that mean?
- Jessica Baker: It means Mom and Dad had...
- Kate 'Mom' Baker: ... a conversation, that we would discuss it much later when everybody could understand!
- Tom Baker: [Getting tickets] One please.
- Tom Baker: [Goes inside the theater and runs into Jimmy] What are you doing here?
- Jimmy Murtaugh: Well, if you must know, I'm still here to make sure this movie is appropriate for our children.
- Tom Baker: It's rated G.
- Theatre Patron: [to Tom] Shh.
- Theatre Patron: Shh.
- Kid in Theater: [to Tom] Sir, could you please sit down?
- Tom Baker: [Whispers] Yeah.
- Jimmy Murtaugh: What are you doing here so early?
- Tom Baker: Father of the daughter always arrives early for pickup duty, everybody knows that.
- Security Guard: [Waves his flashlight at Tom and Jimmy] Excuse me... Is there a problem here?
- Jimmy Murtaugh: Yes, this man's harassing me.
- Tom Baker: This man's guilty of overparenting.
- Security Guard: If you two can't keep it down, I'm gonna throw both of you out.
- Jimmy Murtaugh: [He and Tom see Sarah and Eliot down through the balcony and attempt to be nosy] What, he's stretching.
- Tom Baker: He's doing the move.
- Jimmy Murtaugh: What move?
- Tom Baker: [Scoots Jimmy back] You sit in the theater. You fake a yaaaaawn... . oh boy, am I tired? Hand comes over. Then a little while later, head comes over giving an extra reach there, right?
- Theatre Patron: [Grinning as she sees Tom and Jimmy] Mom, look... those two down there.
- Tom Baker: See what I mean?
- Theatre Patron: Oh, sweet Jesus.
- Security Guard: [Waves flashlight again at them] Warning number 2.
- Jimmy Murtaugh: He was showing me the move. Do you mind?
- Tom Baker: [Places his hand off Jimmy's shoulder] You don't know the move?
- Jimmy Murtaugh: No, I don't know the move! I wasn't a hormone crazed Romeo when I was a kid! I am self-control, I am social sophistication!
- Theatre Patron: Psst... be quiet down there!
- Tom Baker: Your son has raging hormones like every other male teenager.
- Jimmy Murtaugh: Meaning what?
- Tom Baker: Meaning on a sophistication scale, that's 1 step above ape.
- Jimmy Murtaugh: Are you calling my son an ape?
- Tom Baker: He's an ape like every other male teenager.
- Jimmy Murtaugh: Take it back! Take it! Take it back.
- Tom Baker: Were you gonna poke me?
- Jimmy Murtaugh: Because you were asking for it!
- Tom Baker: [He and Jimmy stand up, blocking the theater screen. Everybody furiously tells them to sit down] Well, if I'm asking for it, why don't you give me two? Come on, give me a poke!
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By what name was Treize à la douzaine 2 (2005) officially released in India in English?
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