Jason Lee credited as playing...
Lance Dowds
- Randal Graves: Before he was the Mad Ducats guy, he was just Pickle Fucker. You see, freshman year, the seniors would hunt us down and put us through what they called "initiations." They'd stuff us into lockers or throw us in the girl's shower room naked, but Lance here got the worst of it. The seniors yanked down his pants and shoved a pickle up his ass and made him walk ten feet. If the pickle fell out before he hit the ten-foot mark, he had to take a bite of it, re-insert it, and walk again.
- Elias: Ewwwwww...
- Randal Graves: Yeah. But, don't worry. He made it. His pickle was small enough to stay wedged after only four bites.
- Lance Dowds: I'll bet you're the only guy in the world who still remembers that, Graves.
- Randal Graves: Oh, I bet you still remember it pretty vividly, Pickle Fucker.
- Lance Dowds: Randal Graves. You work here, too? Jesus, anybody else from our graduating class back there?
- Randal Graves: Well well well... Pickle Fucker.
- Elias: Would you have any interest in building the ultimate fan site for both the Lord of the Rings and the Transformers? Because I'd moderate it for free.
- Randal Graves: Ease up, Pillowpants! The dude's not into your D&D, Go-bots bullshit!
- Lance Dowds: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Don't insult the guy! The Go-bots are like the K-Mart transformers.
- Elias: Thank you!