Santa's Slay (2005)

Bill Goldberg: Santa

Photos 

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Quotes 

• Santa Claus : I'm Santa Claus, not fuckin' Dracula!

• Nicholas Yuleson : The clock just struck midnight at the pole. Christmas is officially over for you, Santa!

  Santa Claus : You know, most people make the same mistake. The correct time at the pole is completely discretionary, because the poles are where all the time zones actually converge.

  Mary "Mac" Mackenzie : He's scary, yet educational.

• [entering the strip club] 

  Santa Claus : Ho, ho...

  [oogles topless waitress as she walks past him] 

  Santa Claus : [lustily]  HOES...

• Virginia Mason : Santa?

  [laughs nervously] 

  Santa Claus : Yes, Virginia, there IS a Santa Claus!

• Santa Claus : I see you have met my helldeer

  Pastor Timmons : What in god's name are you doing?

  Santa Claus : Why I'm just trying to spread a little yuletide FEAR!

• Santa Claus : Looks like Grandpa got run over by a reindeer.

• Santa Claus : [while reading a copy of the book 'A Christmas Carol' in the school library]  Boy, Christmas can sure scare the Dickens out of people.

• Pastor Timmons : Honey I had the most terrible nightmare.

  Santa Claus : Visions of sugarplums?

  [Santa hits Pastor over the head with a mallet] 

• Santa Claus : [smirking while he's reading his list]  Who's next?

• Santa Claus : Christmas is over when I say it's over!