Post Impact (2004) User Reviews

Bad, but worth a few chuckles

[voacor · 3/10 · 10 February 2005]

Throw science out the window along with any ideas about plot development, character development and plausible story lines. The special effects are really "special," too. Much of it looks like something you would see in a video game. In fact, I wonder if they didn't just film some shots from a video game to save money.

I enjoyed the film, however, for the laughs. It keeps you wondering just how bad it can get. Just when you think it can't get any sillier-- it surprises you and does.

Just to give you an idea of how bad it is-- the main character is supposedly obsessed with getting back to the zone where he left his wife and daughter, yet he quickly drops his gloom when this British chick sheds her clothes and joins him in the shower. Only moments later, he is clearly hitting on the German chick. Of course, we know he is sensitive and caring, because every now and then he drops his gaze and supposedly thinks of the family he abandoned.

This was a German co-production. I thought the Germans were smarter.

I can't think of a title for this crap

[Jerr · 2/10 · 2 November 2004]

Honestly, I don't understand why they called this movie post-impact. When you title post-impact, you think of how people might be able to survive after the impact of a meteorite.... Well that's not the issue on this movie, the true issue is about the guy trying to come back to rescue his daughter and wife who got trapped in the disaster zone.... no no no.... I'm sorry that's not the issue. the issue was about saving the world from a crazy genocide who controls a massive destruction weapon.... no no no that was wrong too, the issue is about an infiltrated enemy who tries to get control of the weapon to jack up the prices of oil... no no no, I'm sorry the issue is about restoring the world to its initial state prior to the meteorite impact. No I'm sorry that was not the issue either... The issue is about... Yikes, The truth is I can't summarize the movie. In fact, I really don't know what the movie was all about.

Ehh

[wntuc · 3/10 · 28 May 2006]

I read the reviews during opening credits and decided I want to see just how bad a movie could be. I have to admit---I did some channel surfing during many parts. The acting was thin and it had the macho woman/emotional man bits as with a lot of made for TV movies these days. I have to say, its not the worst I've seen and others that could come close are shown right here on the SCi Fi channel. I liked the hard nosed commander though. I kept thinking that if I made a movie, I could do so much with his character.

Maybe an OK movie for a bunch of young teens during a sleep over or if you have a serious case of insomnia at 3am. Other than that, watch one of those old B&W Sci Fi's with the space ship hanging from a string

"Damnation Alley" in the Snow

[talltanbarbie · 5/10 · 26 July 2006]

Did you ever read "Time of the Great Freeze" by Robert Silverberg or go see "Damnation Alley?"

If so, then you've seen this film before--only this time, it's a post Tunguska-like comet impact instead of World War III and no giant cockroaches this time. Dean Cain and a husky named "Sasquatch" lead a team through Ice Age Europe to rescue lost scientists trapped in Berlin in Landmaster-like vehicles. A B-movie science fiction film with all of the associated trappings. Not too bad digital special effects.

Turn off your brain and enjoy, then go get "Damnation Alley" for a (slightly) better performance.

what a waste

[poloele · 1/10 · 23 July 2005]

do not watch this movie. I have to go with some/most of the other commentators, admitting I have not been able to finish it. The acting is abysmal and makes cardboard characters look lively. The plot is confused and harebrained. Don't waste your life in front of the TV, go outside, to the beach, shopping, do your laundry, just do something other than watch this movie, pretty much ANYTHING is better.

I actually wanted to submit this now, but the IMDb guidelines demand I submit at least 10 lines. I'm having a hard time writing anything more about this low point of movie history. Well, I liked the dog - one of the best actors in the whole movie!

Truly awful; full of obvious holes

[isenberg-e · 1/10 · 13 June 2004]

Someday I'm going to learn not to waste my time on made-for-TV movies shown on the Sci-Fi Channel (on USA cable). Admittedly, the special effects on this one were above its normal 1950's B-movie level. Nevertheless, the plot is full of obvious holes that even a child would choke on (e.g., people being shot in all four limbs and still able to win a hand-to-hand fight against an expert fighter). The acting is wooden, the editing is abrupt and annoying, and much of the key dialogue is incomprehensible even with repeated playbacks on a good sound system using a digital feed.

This one isn't worth watching even if you are terminally bored. Read a good book. Heck, read a BAD book; you wouldn't have the intelligence to visit IMDb and own a book THAT bad...

One of the worst movies I've ever seen..

[bansheemaster · 1/10 · 30 July 2005]

I rented this movie thinking it would have been like The Day After Tomorrow, but boy was I wrong. Post Impact stars Dean Cain (known for being Superman from Lois&Clark, and the Ripley's Believe It or Not guy) and a bunch of other small time actors. The plot revolves around a meteor hitting Europe and sending it into an ice age. Sounds like a good movie so far, right? Well.. so far. However, the plot gets completely ridiculous where a 'bad guy' takes over some kind of satellite that could melt the ice but instead uses it to destroy cities (ironically in the same city the meter hit). So Dean Cain and a bunch of soldiers set out on a mission to stop him (the closer they get to him, the colder it gets). The movie gets incredibly boring towards the last half (unnecessary and slow gun fights) with a rather hilarious ending that defeats the entire purpose of the movie. Also, very horrible special effects and mediocre acting; lots of goofs (i.e. going outside in -50C temperature). My suggestion is to pass it up and to completely forget it ever existed.

Not the worst but makes no impact whatsoever

[TheLittleSongbird · 2/10 · 13 August 2013]

Only two small things stop Post Impact from scoring any lower, and those are Dean Cain, who tries his best though he has been much better, and the dog, who is adorable, very well-trained and certainly the best actor in Post Impact. Which is not entirely complimentary seeing as the rest of the acting is so stiff that wooden planks are more animated in comparison. The worst was Joanna Taylor, a total blank and there is nothing appealing about her. They are saddled by the shallow ciphers that the movie passes for characters and some of the most stilted dialogue, that is far too heavy on the small-talk, of any movie seen recently. Post Impact is also edited in a frenzied and unfinished manner and the special effects are on par with some of the worst effects from the 70s-80s. In short, very cheap and out of date. The music is generic and repetitive and the sound and sound effects are very muddied, the gun shots lack authenticity and any crucial dialogue is made difficult to hear or properly understand. Even worse is the story, plodding and ridiculous, with an out-of-place sex scene, one of the stupidest endings of any movie from the past ten years or so and countless mistakes and goofs that take away from everything. It was also not easy to tell what the basic story was, and the movie itself probably didn't either, seeing how much it jumped around to the point of near-incoherence. On the whole, with the exceptions of Cain and the dog a waste of time, though personally there are worse movies out there. 2/10 Bethany Cox

Worst Dean Cain movie since...never mind

[contact-264 · 1/10 · 22 January 2005]

What a terrible movie this was. The only reason I rented it, was because I got a job at Blockbuster and I get 10 free rentals a weeks.

Couple of things about this movie: -Apparently they forgot how to COUNT past 2010, and started all over again at 03 P.I. (Post Impact) - how clever. But wouldn't that screw up all the computer networks that these poor post impact citizens are still highly conveniences with? -I guess Dean Cain was the only guy who couldn't find a razor after this post apocalyptic asteroid hit earth, or at least a month before the camera crew showed up. All of the extras and other actors are freshly shaven, except for Dean who looks like he pulled a Beavis & Butthead and glued hair to his face.

-The 'ice' was terrible, whoever headed the arts department must have been blind. At times the ice looked like bricks with cloth on them, and other times it looked like Saran Wrap.

-It's negative 53 degrees C, yet they walk around this barren winter wasteland with little toques on...they don't even cover their faces. At those temperatures, your skin would frost bite in 2 minutes...but don't worry, Dean Cain's 'beard' will provide sufficient warmth, and if it doesn't the terrible 'jokes' in the movie will take your mind off the suck.

-Terrible acting & writing. The characters spent more time with small talk than they did with dramatic dialogue, seriously, they do an awful lot of small talk, even at the climax of the movie, they small talk.

-The united states, although not affected, has renamed itself as the 'National United Northern States' or NUNS, how dumb is that.

-The guy that played a blind man is a terrible actor. He's looking all around as if he doesn't know where his daughter is, when she's holding his head and speaking directly to his face.

-The rest of the world casually assumes that nobody lives in Berlin (where the comet struck) anymore, and that's how they explain it too. "We didn't think anyone was alive, so we didn't bother sending rescue missions." -All these 250 survivors living in tunnels or whatever somehow managed to scrape enough P.I. Currency together to buy some new coats and barrels to burn their fuel source (beats me) in. The barrels are BRAND NEW, shiny and red...doesn't add to the 'barely surviving in a harsh winter desert for 3 years' feel they were going for.

-The gun sound effects sound like something from an old western movie. The WORST sound in a feature, seriously.

-Apparently gun shots don't hurt that much in 3 P.I., as Dean Cain gets shot in the kidney and the knee, but it doesn't effect him...Dean, you're not superman anymore.

OK I could go on forever, this movie is the pits, 1 out of 10, only because I can't go lower. It's so boring and terrible, it felt like I watched a 3 hour movie...but truthfully I only finished it so I could write this review.

The only thing this movie had going for it was the fact that there wasn't any gigantic snakes...but they made up for that with terrible computer effects and CGI that looks like it came out of the late 80s...along with the rest of the props for the high tech 2013 missile base that downgraded itself when the comet struck.

I'd go on more, but there's a word limit of 1000, don't bother renting it unless you work for Blockbuster like me and get the rentals free - and don't waste the bandwidth trying to download it.

Don't even bother with this movie.

[kos5 · 1/10 · 4 May 2005]

In my local rental place, I found this movie, and ended up picking it up because the person I was with was thoroughly convinced that it looked good, like "The Day After Tomorrow".

Ha! Far from it! Trust me, I've seen many movies, this was probably the worst one I've ever seen. Don't even bother with this movie, you know...unless you want to get a good laugh at how bad a movie can be. The acting in reminded me a lot of an elementary school play. From the horrible acting, to the ever changing accents, to the cheap sets and screenplay, this movie was just a horrible entertainment experience. It caused me to do something that I've never done while watching a movie...Leave the room.

Graphics suck...Movie was good though overall

[twilight_angel17 · 8/10 · 18 January 2013]

While the graphics pretty much sucked.. I did like this movie. The acting could have been better in many parts but it overall was a pretty good movie. I love the Dog in this movie and was very happy that they don't kill him off like they usually do in movies like this.. They didn't go with the typical dog saves human and dies.. However the sex in the shower part was poorly done in my opinion.. guy searching for his wife and child ends up screwing some other lady? wow. If you are planning on watching this movie, I advise that you not expect awesome graphics because as stated above they aren't the best.. It is clear this was probably a low budget film, I feel that had it had a slightly higher budget graphics probably would have been much better, or at least slightly better. For a "end of the world/Disaster" movie it is pretty good. I happen to like movies like this, but I have seen a few that are much better.

Why I watch SciFi

[L_Miller · 6/10 · 29 August 2010]

(as they were known before their spell checker stopped working).

Don't understand the venom here. The movie isn't great, but it isn't terrible either; don't know the preferences of the other reviewers but I would watch movies like this before crap like Hostel or another remake of a 70s movie that wasn't that good the first time.

Post-Impact is a mid-Europe production crew making a movie with an interesting premise; a comet strike renders northern Europe uninhabitable. After a rescue mission is destroyed by a microwave satellite controlled from the impact zone, a team moves in to discover the truth. The source is found, and it turns out not everyone on the team is working with the same agenda.

Yes, there are Euro-accents all over the place, the equipment is wrong, wrong, wrong (the .22 inserts on the M16s, and, well, pretty much everything about the military and government aspects). Sometimes it sounds like Hanz und Franz from SNL wrote and directed an action movie. But it's a interesting premise, Dean Cain hits the marks and says the lines and it brings an interesting setting into your living room. Some characters have good turns.

No, it's not great. Nevertheless, I find SciFi (no, I'm not going to write Syfy, because I am not Hooked on Phonics) movies more interesting than 99% of the crap and recycled garbage that comes out of the big entertainment houses these days.

No, really. No matter how bad the acting, how laughable the special effects, SciFi movies nearly always have a gem (sometimes a very tiny gem) in there, a premise or a characters or a setting which transcends the Robert McKee/focus-group fueled McMovies. Yes, you have to reach pretty deep into some of those things to pull out the diamond but it's nearly always there, and it's there in Post-Impact. Look for it.

I feel like I was cheated out of 90 minutes of my life.

[kobusl · 1/10 · 16 June 2005]

Let me start by saying this is my first post on the site, and I was actually moved to write this by PI: Post Impact. The plot comes down to this: After earth is hit by a meteor we fall into a new ice age. The new government of the Northern States sends a mission to Berlin, to try to get control of a weapon which might be able to defrost earth. My wife rented the movie thinking it might be a bit of harmless fun- I found myself laughing hysterically even though there's no comedic moments to speak of. The plot is thin, it contains probably the most unnecessary sex scene I have EVER seen in a movie (counting late night adult dramas), the main character is one of the most shallow people I have seen in a movie (even though he is on a mission to find his wife and daughter, he falls for just about every girl that looks at him), the acting is, well, not great, and the best part: The awesomely bad CGI effects that wouldn't find a place in a computer game. There was just no way this was believable, even my four year old daughter spotted it. I would not recommend this movie to ANYONE, not even really die hard Dean Cain fans.

One of the worst movies ever....

[fast_car · 1/10 · 28 June 2004]

This definitely is one of the worst movies ever. I still don't know why i watched it all the way through. The acting is poor, the plot/script as well, the special effects are outdated and the movie is just riding on the popularity wave of the "Day after tomorrow". Another noticeable thing is, that Berlin seems to be populated mostly by Americans in the near future and the scientific Research facilities, the Airport and everything else seems to be run by the U.S. Air Force...this is a German/American Co-Production. I would have expected from them to be at least a little bit more accurate.

Don't watch this movie! Go out and rent "The Day After Tomorrow" when it comes out. Until then, your time would be better spent doing anything else but watching this movie 0/10!!

'Awful' doesn't quite describe this movie...

[alistair-ross · 1/10 · 21 March 2005]

... and I din't know what really does! I wasted a cheap blank DVD recording this movie from the Sci-Fi channel. I was unsure just how dire this film was until I saw the action (bad adjective) scenes where there were shoot-outs between the characters.

The budget on this movie was obviously so low that it allowed only one shoot of each scene, and it was in the can, regardless of how good or bad it was. The acting was of the poorest quality, including Dean Caine, who I know can do much better.

Mustn't forget the dog though... he was pretty much on queue in the attack sequences, and lived through the movie. I was fully expecting the old 'dog saves master and is killed doing so' cliché, as that is where the whole movie headed.

If you are thinking about watching this move, please save yourself the time and do something more enjoyable like pulling out your fingernails!

what a pile of crap.

[BBVsam · 1/10 · 1 January 2005]

Just got done watching this dreadfully awful movie. Dear God, why did they bother? Thankfully, I rented it and it was free. I work at a major video store and this title will not be recommended..at all...not a chance....don't waste your money, your time or your life by watching this utter piece of garbage. An all time low for the Sci-Fi Channel. Ooops, maybe I should have said the B-Movie Channel. Besides the terrible plot holes, the bad acting, the sorriest special effects I've seen in a while, I thought it was comical that it was a movie about the Earth being froze over ...and not once did I ever see anyone's breath...and the "ice" around everywhere just screamed Styrofoam. Pathetic, bad, terrible...etc.

The world as a frozen waste land.

[michaelRokeefe · 4/10 · 26 August 2005]

Not exactly as awesome as THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW(2004), but POST IMPACT is worth your attention. This post-apocalyptic thriller has Captain Tom Parker(Dean Cain)joining a strangely mixed team of military officers and scientists searching for remains of civilization in Europe, after a comet causes a new ice age on Earth. There is a possibility that the solar powered satellite, that is believed to have hastened the frigid nuclear winter, could just be the answer to correcting the desolation. Some real expansive snow and ice scenes; story line is at times hard to follow; and some brief nudity that will bring a rise in heart rate. Other members of the cast: Bettina Zimmermann, Hanns Zischler, Nigel Bennett and Joanna Taylor, who proves to be more than an eyeful. Cain is a clean-cut hero, who shows he can be tempted. That-a-boy, Dean.

There are no words,

[DebraIonaVogel · 3/10 · 14 August 2020]

...but I'll try anyway.

ScyFy movies are all terrible, everyone knows that. Theyre also funny and give once popular actors a chance to make a movie again.

This movie is awful, plot holes as big as an uncharted asteroid and -of course- laughably silly.

The "special effects"looks as though a teenager did them on their phone. Wait. A teenager could do better.

But, if you've had a bad day and need to lighten things up, watch these poor actors try and get through their scenes. Your day may not seem so bad after all...at least you didn't have to participate in making this movie. I hope the catering made it worth it for them!

Horrible

[lawson4333 · 1/10 · 2 December 2006]

I think this was a total waste of time and effort. The movie was sooooo bad, I turned it off. Thank Heaven I only paid $0.25 to rent it. The best part was the first five minutes (when the comet struck). The plot was weak, acting was bad, and my favorite character was also the dog. I really can't think of anything else to say about this sad piece of junk, except if you don;t have a beach, library, do the dishes, go to the dentist, rake leaves, dust the house, do anything but watch this movie. Hopefully I've taken up the required ten lines, because i feel obligated to tell my fellow movie watchers to please find something else to do instead of watching this junk.

Good to watch on a rainy of snowy weekend

[robert_leath · 4/10 · 9 September 2019]

Yep. The acting isnt the best and the script is nothing to write home about. But on a cold winters day, with nothing else to do, it isnt too bad.

Keeps you interested, Not too "SHABBY" for a "B" movie!

[lowmant · 8/10 · 4 January 2006]

I think this movie was worth watching for the entertainment value alone. Others have really ragged on it as being so bad they could hardly watch it and how it was so hard for them to even write their review comments. Well to them I ask this : What did you expect? You knew it was a "B" class movie and starred Dean Cain. All his foreign made films are about the same style. I like them; he is not a bad actor and all his co-stars were OK too. The thing people forget when they watch "B" movies is that they have to make the movie on a very low budget and make the payroll too. Now I say if the movie has a good story line and the plot is coherent and you like the stars then it is a movie worth the time to watch. Besides it goes along with the other class "A" movies made this pass year on the same type subjects "Category 7" and "The Day After Tomorrow" and "Deep Impact" etc. This make a nice addition to anyones collection. It may not be the best one of your collection but I have seen a lot worst. Dean Cain has appeared in many movies of this type and if you like this one at all you should try a search on his name for the others he made, I'm sure you won't be disappointed.

Decent TV Movie

[nalders · 7/10 · 4 January 2007]

This movie really doesn't deserve the bashing it's received. Granted, it's a TV movie. Talent and production value are correspondingly lower than a better-funded Hollywood project, but they did very well with what was available.

Dean Cain plays his usual character; slightly bland, but generally likable. Bettina Zimmermann and Joanna Taylor are both very hot, and turn in decent performances, to boot. Special effects are nothing special, but better than most TV movies and some Hollywood films. I thought the premise was interesting, too, although they didn't have time to explore it the way a mini-series might have. Still, I think they did a fine job of addressing the major points.

There was an acceptable level of action. It could have been better, but then again that is usually the case.

The pacing was actually excellent on this, never bogging down. It takes enough time to do the scene, but doesn't linger (except for a brief 'villain's exposition' scene that seems overdone, mainly because he's rambling pointlessly. I could have done without that.)

All in all, a solid film.

Move over Birdemic.

[redmondson-81269 · 2/10 · 10 February 2021]

There's a new competitor in town, and it's name is Post Impact.

Tragically bad writing, acting, directing, special effects.

If you have a night where you want to watch a comedy and you can't find anything, this will do.

I would say my favorite bit was when the military plane was falling apart, about to crash, and all the military personnel passengers reacted by getting up from their seats and forming a impromptu mosh pit in the middle of the aircraft. Because that's what you do when a plane is experiencing extreme turbulence or crashing, you get up from your seat and run around the plane aimlessly.

Funny movie

[roadrunnerpropertiesthunderbay · 2/10 · 13 December 2020]

I gave it and extra star for the good comedy. Scientists only realize two hours prior that the meteor will strike the earth. The military hero captain spends three years tyring to get back to his wife and at his first opportunity to reach that goal he has sex with the first woman who hits on him. She also happens to be his commander in their mission yet struts around like a supermodel and acts totally unprofessional as a military member of any rank. The special effects are quite funny and look like a video game. The 'hero' shows no personal regard for this woman he's been intimate with and instantly strikes up a romance with a beautiful scientist all while still being committed to finding his wife and daughter. Then there's a few gun battles where every turns on each other and the hero ends up with three gun shots wounds and is still able to participate in a hand to hand fight with his commander who's gone evil and who refuses to die after falling ten stories. In the end she gets killed by the beautiful scientist who also has gun shots wounds. He finds his wife and daughter frozen and dead but it's a happy ending because all in the same day the scientist suddenly saves the planet and he now has a new daughter, woman, and a dog. I could same more but you should just watch it for a laugh.

How to destroy a good idea for a movie

[mcgriswald · 1/10 · 16 November 2005]

This movie starts off with a decent premise: a meteor has hit the Earth in Europe and cast the world into a perpetual winter.

The Northern Hemisphere is in an ice age and the equatorial areas are in a state of perpetual gloom and rain. Three years after the event, its determined that someone is controlling a satellite that has the capacity to destroy what remains of the Earth's population. A "crack" team is sent in to the impact zone in Germany to determine where the signals controlling the satellite are originating.

So far so good, right?

Wrong.

The producers of this movie decided to destroy the promise of this movie by inserting terrible dialog, huge and obvious plot holes, glaring continuity errors, and so many logical and factual inconsistencies that the movie makes your head spin.

Plot changes occur without any rhyme or reason; its as if they fired and hired writers but had already shot the scenes from the original writer and decided to leave it in the film.

Heres a few clunkers: When the team is initially inserted via a special cargo plane carrying some weird airborne tank thingy, there appears to be about 8 crewmembers including the 4 main characters, but as they run into difficulties later in the movie, there always seems to be a couple extras who magically appear to be shot or garroted from behind, etc.

When they meet with the subterranean denizens of Berlin, they all speak English, and are relatively unconcerned by this arrival of the first outsiders in three years. They are all wearing spiffy new ski jackets, yet burning trash in barrels like a bunch of Bowery bums.

Dean Cains character takes several shots from a 9mm glock, yet is able to engage in hand-to-hand combat, and avoid falling from a catwalk by hanging on with one arm. During the same scene, he applies a tourniquet to his arm, (the same one he uses to dangle from the catwalk) and it disappears just before his second fight with "The Bitch who Wouldn't Die".

Later, we see Cain in the closing shots wearing the same parka, which has miraculously had its bullet holes and bloodstains removed.

All in all, I can only recommend this film to film students as a caution on how not to make a movie.