The R.M. (2003)

Kirby Heyborne: Jared Phelps

Quotes 

• Jared : But...

  Brigham : Butts are for chairs pal.

• Jared : Kirby? That's not even a name!

  [Later] 

  Ring seller : Kirby? That's not even a name.

• Jared : [attempting to explain who he is]  Home! Me! Home! Me!

  Humu : Hey, Homey!

• Jared : Kirby? What kind of a name is that? It's like "Kirby from Rigby likes to play Frisbee."

• Humu : [Humu is a *very* large Tongan exchange student]  Dude! Your fiance is *hot*.

  Jared : You speak English?

  Humu : Better than Tongan, actually.

  Jared : But... but...

  Humu : Hey, look, man, no offense, but all your mom ever talks about is food storage and Relief Society centerpieces. To avoid an awkward conversation, I just had to eat. Heck, I was a "buck-eighty" when I first got here. Ha ha!