It's a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie (2002 TV Movie)

Joan Cusack: Rachel Bitterman

Photos 

Quotes 

• Rachel Bitterman : "Working for a dream." That's beautiful. You know, my employees work for salaries.

• Kermit : Ms. Bitterman, you can take the Muppet Theatre, but you'll never take the theatre in our hearts!

  Rachel Bitterman : Well, that's good, because I don't want the theatre in your hearts; I want the theatre that exists in reality!

• Rachel Bitterman : You are very fit for a plus sized pig.

  Miss Piggy : And you will not look good with a plus sized lip.

• Kermit : We're going to get you that money.

  Rachel Bitterman : Yeah, when pigs fly.

  [Miss Piggy suddeny comes flying by, dangling from the "five golden rings"] 

  Rachel Bitterman : For the record, I consider that flying pig to be a coincidence and not a sign from God!

• Fozzie : Where's Ms. Bitterman's office? I gotta get this money up to her!

  Security Guard : Let me think. If I was a bear, I'd store my honey in a tree somewhere...

  Fozzie : No, not honey! Money! I gotta see Ms. Bitterman so I can give her her MO-NEY!

  Security Guard : Oh, Ms. Bitterman's laundry. She's on the 17th floor. I'll call her to tell her you're coming.

  Fozzie : Thank you!

  Security Guard : Gesundheit.

  [Cut to Ms. Bitterman's office. She answers the phone] 

  Rachel Bitterman : Hello?

  [pause] 

  Rachel Bitterman : No! That can't be! Stop him!

  [pause] 

  Rachel Bitterman : No, not stockings! STOP HIM! Oh, never mind.