Katherine: Listen, when I was a little girl I used to spend hours looking for ladybugs. Finally, I'd just give up and fall asleep in the grass. When I woke up, they were crawling all over me.
Martini: Signora, between Austria and Italy, there is a section of the Alps called the Semmering. It is an impossibly steep, very high part of the mountains. They built a train track over these Alps to connect Vienna and Venice. They built these tracks even before there was a train in existence that could make the trip. They built it because they knew some day, the train would come.
Frances: Do you know the most surprising thing about divorce? It doesn't actually kill you. Like a bullet to the heart or a head-on car wreck. It should. When someone you've promised to cherish till death do you part says "I never loved you," it should kill you instantly. You shouldn't have to wake up day after day after that, trying to understand how in the world you didn't know. The light just never went on, you know. I must have known, of course, but I was too scared to see the truth. Then fear just makes you so stupid.
Martini: No, it's not stupid, Signora Mayes. L'amore e cieco.
Frances: Oh, love is blind. Yeah, we have that saying too.
Martini: Everybody has that saying because it's true everywhere.
Katherine: Never lose your childish innocence. It's the most important thing.
[last lines]
Frances: Unthinkably good things can happen even late in the game. It's such a surprise.
Martini: Signora. Please stop being so sad. If you continue like this, I will be forced to make love to you. And I've never been unfaithful to my wife.
[last lines]
Frances: What are four walls, anyway? They are what they contain. The house protects the dreamer. Unthinkably good things can happen, even late in the game. It's such a surprise.
Katherine: Regrets are a waste of time. They're the past crippling you in the present.
Frances: Do traffic lights mean anythng around here?
Martini: On that day we looked for your snake, you said to me that you wanted there to be a wedding here. And then you said you wanted there to be a family here.
Frances: You're right... I got my wish. I got everything I asked for.
Katherine: It's a nice little villa. Rather run down, but redeemable. Are you going to buy it?
Frances: No, no, no. I'm, I'm just a tourist. Here for the day.
German Woman: You greedy Americans. You think you're so entitled. You ruin everything.
Frances: A lot of us feel really badly about that.
Frances: [in voiceover] Every day I watch for the old man with the flowers, and I wonder, was he born here? Did he love someone here? Did he lose someone here? He doesn't seem as curious about me, but that's all right. These days I'm something of a loner myself.
Frances: [voiceover] What is it about love that makes us so stupid?
Frances: But, please tell the contessa that this is what I got for my house recently, in dollars, minus the work on the place, um... hammers, buckets, men,
[under her breath]
Frances: chocolate, and a rental car to drive off a cliff when this all turns out to have been a terrible mistake. That's what I can pay.
Patti: There's something strange about these trees. It's like they know.
Frances: And they know that we know that they know.
Patti: They're creepy. Creepy Italian trees. Of course, the baby's going to like them cause it's going to be a creepy Italian baby who goes around saying things like 'Ciao mama' and doing that weird backward hand wave thing. Life is strange.
Signora Raguzzi: It's a house, not a Vespa. What are you going to do, steal it?
Frances: [narrating] So I was now the owner of a villa whose lands it would take two oxen two days to plow. Owning neither an ox nor a plow, I'd have to take their word for that.
Frances: Inner voice... "What the fuck am I doing on a gay tour of Tuscany?"
[They say they built the train tracks over the Alps between Vienna and Venice before there was a train that can make the trip, they build it anyway: they knew one day a train will come]
Frances: [after having just missed Marcello] Damn it, Patti, why didn't you make him wait? I mean, come on, you're a tough dyke, you know? You could've tied him to a chair; you could've crippled him; you could've faked labor, at least!
Colleague: Tom is one lucky bastard. A literary wife who makes brownies? I swear, if you tell me you cook in the nude, I'll go home and kill myself.