Episode list

After Cartman and Kyle are infected with the AIDS virus, they turn to Magic Johnson for assistance in finding a cure.

Distraught over the media's nonstop coverage of her, Britney Spears attempts to commit suicide, but survives despite blowing the top half of her head off. Disgusted by this treatment of her, the boys attempt to help, only to learn the secret behind the media's cruel scrutiny of celebrities.

South Park declares cats illegal after kids start getting high on cat urine. Cartman starts hiding neighborhood cats in his attic to protect them, and Kenny becomes an addict and starts having Heavy Metal (1981) hallucinations.

Canada goes on strike and demands more money, but nobody takes the strike seriously. However, the boys try to make money for Canada by turning Butters into an Internet video star.

Cartman is commended for his excellent substitute teaching, so he is brought to the inner city to help the high schoolers. Meanwhile, Ms. Garrison wants to be Mr. Garrison again.

A prolonged Internet service outage hits South Park and most of the rest of the country, and Randy moves the Marsh family to California hoping to find a connection (and Internet porn for himself).

A class field trip to a frontier park turns into a hostage situation when a group of robbers use the park to evade the police, but the park employees won't help resolve the situation because they won't get out of character.

Cartman and Butters go to P.F. Chang's to try to uncover the Chinese conspiracy to take over the U.S. Stan and Kyle accuse Steven Spielberg and George Lucas of raping Indiana Jones.

Cartman makes fun of Wendy after she delivers a report on breast cancer. She challenges him to a fight, but he keeps finding ways to get out of it. But he also won't stop making fun of her.

With Craig's help, the boys start up a Peruvian pan flute band to make money. However, they are detained by Homeland Security and sent to Peru to end the "Pandemic." In the pan flute bands' absence, giant guinea pigs invade South Park.

Craig and the boys are stranded in the Andes Mountains while giant guinea pigs wreak havoc all over the planet. Craig is the only person who can end the terror, but he doesn't care and won't do anything about it.

While the rest of the nation is distracted by the results of the presidential election, Barack Obama and John McCain set out to complete their true combined objective: a daring "Ocean's Eleven" style jewel heist.

The boys try to resist the "High School Musical" fad when it hits South Park Elementary, while also trying to convince the school's top singer that he should follow his dream and try out for the basketball team.

Butters starts hanging out with the Vampire kids, who are angering the Goth kids at South Park Elementary because everybody is confusing the Vampire kids with them.