Andrew Shaifer credited as playing...
Bernard
- Bernard: Yoo-hoo Wayman.
- Wayman: Hey Bernard.
- Shame: Excuse me, who's this?
- Wayman: This is Bernard and what's wrong with you?
- Shame: "The Bernard"?
- Bernard: Yes it's me.
- Shame: Homewrecker. He's with me.
- Wayman: Shame. I can't believe you just.
- Shame: You are my stuff and you know it girl.
- Bernard: Stuff?
- Wayman: Bernard he's lying. Don't believe him.
- Shame: Oh you did not say that last night when we was in bed together girl.
- Bernard: You slept with him? You slut!
- Shame: Save your tears honey you never had a chance. Coffee's good with cream, but better when it's black.
- Bernard: Don't you ever call me again. And for you Mr. Coffee, if you like a little steamed milk with your double expresso, I'm your man.
- Wayman: Bernard I'm sorry. I'll call you.
- Bernard: Shame why did you do that?
- Shame: If you help me find this girl, I'll call and tell him it was a joke.
- Bernard: [after Shame lies about him and Wayman] He's lying! Don't believe him, Bernard. Don't believe him.
- Shame: Oh, you didn't say that last night when we was in bed together, girl!
- Bernard: You *slept* with him? You *slut*!
- [slaps Wayman senseless]
- Wayman: Bernard?
- Shame: Save your tears, honey, you never had a chance! Coffee's good with cream but better when it's black!
- Bernard: Don't you ever, *ever* call me again. And you "Mr. Coffee", if you like some steamed milk with your double espresso, I'm your man!
- Wayman: Bernard, I'm sorry! I promise I'll call you.
- Bernard: [simultaneously] Don't sorry me, Wayman!