Clarissa gets a major crush on local weatherman Flip Fontana. Her rational head is horrified by the foolish state of her heart. Despite her best efforts, she can't stop daydreaming about him and trying to concoct ways to meet him.
With a Mazda Miata grand prize as incentive, Clarissa enters a magazine contest, "My Brother - What a Guy" and grossly exaggerates Ferguson's qualities.
Sam stays with the Darlings while his father is away and becomes the perfect son. Sam and Clarissa are working on a school project, but he spends so much time being polite to her parents, that he never has time for Clarissa, and she feels left out.
Aunt Mafalda has been tasked with overseeing Clarissa and Ferguson while their parents are out of town. Clarissa worries that her demonstrative aunt will ruin her planned slumber party.
A great debate begins after the Darlings realize that Marshall's dream project is the same planned mini-mall development being protested by Janet. Clarissa worries that the debate may result in divorce.
Clarissa is picked as the understudy for the lead actor of the school play. She's overjoyed by the 'easy' assignment until the lead falls ill on opening night. Clarissa attempts to quickly learn her lines but Ferguson's help interferes.
Clarissa's overbearing guidance counselor encourages her to participate in normal teenage girl activities. After giving the recommended activities a try, Clarissa decides that being normal is overrated.
After being left alone for the night, Clarissa and Ferguson take turns scaring one another. Over the course of the evening, the Darling war continues escalate until an unexpected guest frightens them both.
Clarissa turns to her computer to help her finish an assignment for which she must write a poem. Not only does the computer "write" a strange but well-loved poem, but also Clarissa is chosen to represent her school at a banquet for young poets.
Sam's mom comes to town to play in a roller derby match. Although she is the "Most Valuable Slayer," she announces that she wants to quit the derby and take Sam back to Seattle to live with her for good.
Clarissa is broke and decides to get a job. She declines to use Ferguson's job placement business, but lets the librarian help her with her resume and job search. Clarissa gets multiple job offers, all of which she accepts.
Ferguson has decided to torture Clarissa by giving her "The Silent Treatment." Clarissa retaliates by devising a software program designed to gross him out when he steps into the bathroom.
Janet recruits the whole family to participate in Volunteer Day at the Children's Museum. Clarissa desperately wants to get out of this assignment and lucks out when the museum closes because of boiler problems.
Ferguson has fallen in love and is asking everyone for advice, including Clarissa, who wants to give him the worst advice possible. Yet every bad idea she gives him works in his favor and all the girls go crazy for him.
During a midlife crisis, Marshall decides to move the family to a small South Pacific island. Clarissa does her best to change his mind before the house sells.
