Beetlejuice (1988)

Jeffrey Jones: Charles

Photos 

Quotes 

• Charles : As soon as we get settled, we'll build you a darkroom in the basement, okay?

  Lydia : My whole life is a dark room. One big dark room.

  Delia : So you were miserable in New York City, and now you're going to be miserable out here in the sticks. At least someone's life hasn't been upheaved.

• Otho : [while Lydia shows them the attic]  Fabulous. 'Otho Fenlock's Locked Door Ghosts' Probably committed suicide up there. I'm totally enchanted.

  Delia : They're in there? They must live like animals.

  Charles : It's locked. How'd they get in?

  Delia : [bangs on the door]  Open this door, you dead people, or we'll bust it down and we'll drag you out by the ropes you hang yourselves with!

  Lydia : Shh! They didn't commit suicide.

  Delia : It doesn't matter. Lydia, I have a chance to teach you something here: you have got to take the upper hand in all situations or people, whether they're dead or alive, will walk all over you.

• [reading The Handbook for the Living and the Dead] 

  Charles : This thing reads like stereo instructions.

  [Harry Belafonte's "Shake Shake Senora" plays in the background] 

  Charles : Oh, sounds like Lydia got an "A" on the math test.

  [a head sculpture of the Betelgeuse snake appears next to him] 

  Charles : Jeez!

  [Charles falls out of his chair. Delia pulls the sculpture up and smiles] 

  Delia : He likes it.

• Delia : Charles, I will not stop living and breathing art just because you need to relax.

  Charles : Ha.

  Delia : I'm here with you. I will live with you in this hellhole, but I must express myself. If you don't let me gut out this house and make it my own, I will go insane, AND I WILL TAKE YOU WITH ME!

  Charles : [after a long pause]  Yeah, well, you know, maybe the house could use a little remodeling. Uh... But, why don't you just leave this room alone, okay?

  Delia : [smiles]  Okay.

  [Delia and Otho leave as Charles goes furious] 

  Barbara : [furiously]  I'm gonna get her.

• Charles : Nice building... bad roof... goooood parking.

• Otho : Oh, you family types, you got other things to worry about. Maxie Dean's coming up here tonight. You got to figure out a way to sell these ghosts. I can only do so much.

  Charles : What are you gonna do, Otho, viciously rearrange their enviroment?

  Otho : I know just as much about the supernatural as I do about interior design.

• Charles : Delia Deetz, welcome home.

  Delia : [being kissed]  Charles...

  Charles : It's okay, there's no damage. See? It's okay. Good, sturdy country craftsmanship. And look at that kitchen. You're finally gonna be able to cook a decent meal.

  [Delia rolls her eyes] 

• Charles : Pumpkin... sweetheart...

  [kisses her and forces her out his study room] 

  Charles : Go help your mother.

  Lydia : Maybe *you* can relax in a haunted house, but I can't.

• Delia : [as Bernard, Grace, and Beryl leaves not convinced of the ghost]  This was not a hallucination. This was real. We all just experienced a super-powerful, paranormal experience, and it was real.

  Bernard : Delia, you are a flake. You have always been a flake. If you insist on frightening people, do it with your sculpture.

  [Bernard slams the door as he leaves] 

  Charles : Drive carefully!

  Delia : [aghast]  I'm dead.

• Charles : I'm not sure this is the right environment for Lydia. Snakes, ghosts...

  Delia : Shrimp.