Summer Rental (1985)

John Candy: Jack Chester

Photos 

8 more photos

Quotes 

• Jack Chester : Get the hell out of here now!

  Fat Man : You get out of here fella. I'm trying to watch the Smurfs.

  Jack Chester : You're trying to watch the Smurfs?

  Fat Man : Yeah.

  Jack Chester : Did you see the one where Papa Smurf took a crutch and smashed the shit out of a guy with a red hat? Did you see that one? You want to see that one?

  [Fat Man runs away] 

• Scully : [Discussing the ocean]  She'll make ya rich, or she'll feed ya to the fishes. If she wants you to dance, sonny boy, you've got to follow her lead.

  Jack Chester : Didn't I read that on your bathroom wall?

  Scully : Yes. And it's as true today as when I hung it there.

• Scully : Hey mate! Good to see you. What can I get ya?

  Jack Chester : How about... drunk.

  Scully : [laughing]  We can handle that!

  Jack Chester : [receives shot of rum]  Do you have an ice cube for this?

• Jack Chester : Can you tread water with that hook?

• Jack Chester : Don't serve those.

  Al : What are you doing?

  Jack Chester : These are my lobsters.

  Al : Your lobsters?

  Jack Chester : That's right you've got my table but you're not getting my lobsters.

  Al : Oh and this is your table?

  Jack Chester : [Slams his hands on the table]  My table!

• Vicki : Can I have your honest opinion about something?

  Jack Chester : Sure.

  Vicki : [lifts her bikini top]  What do you think of these? Well, how do they look?

  Jack Chester : About what?

  Vicki : These!

  Jack Chester : Oh, those.

  Vicki : Yeah. How do they look?

  Jack Chester : Uh, similar?

  Vicki : No, I mean, do they look good? I just got them.

  Jack Chester : Who had them before you?

  Vicki : Nobody, silly. I just recently had them enlarged.

  Jack Chester : Oh, I see.

• Jack Chester : Where's Angus with that sail? There's only two more shopping days left.

  Scully : He's searching the entire coast for it. I'm sure he'll find it.

  Jack Chester : How can you be so sure?

  Scully : If he don't, I'll kill him.

• Jack Chester : [Jack has spilled a huge bag of dog food all over the floor and is trying to clean it up]  Do you have a dustpan or something?

  Dan Gardner : You can just leave it sir.

  Jack Chester : Good idea, because you might have a guest this summer and they have a dog and this is excellent stuff.

• Jack Chester : Should she be talking to him?

  Sandy Chester : Why not?

  Jack Chester : Why not? Are you crazy? He's a life guard. They're all sex maniacs. Right now each of his gonads is screaming me first.

• Ed : I'm sorry, mister, but she's worrying the whole world with her new knockers.

  Vicki : Oh, be quiet, Ed. I just want his opinion.

  Ed : She's so insecure! Last night, she shoved them in the clerk's face at the 7-11, Honey, relax, will you. They're beautiful. They look right and they feel right!

  Vicki : Yeah?

  Ed : Mister, will you try them and tell her they feel right? As a favor to me?

  Jack Chester : [cops of feel]  Oh, yeah. Boy those are so lifelike it's ridiculous.

  Ed : See. Everybody likes 'em. Thanks, buddy, I owe you one.

  Jack Chester : What are neighbors for.

• Scully : There's nothing like the sea to lift your spirits and put a song in your heart.

  Jack Chester : I know what you mean. You must know a lot of ocean songs.

  Scully : I do. Here's a sea ditty my mother taught me.

  [singing] 

  Scully : Love, Exciting and new, Come aboard, We're expecting you, And love, Life's sweetest reward, Let if flow

  Jack Chester , Scully : It flows back to you, The Love Boat...

• Jack Chester : I love you Scully. That's not the booze talkin' either.

• Jack Chester : Come on Hal. Can't you pull a few strings for me?

  Hal : It's not on my hands. The agency gave you a mandatory five. Look Jack, you've been landing planes for 13 years. Face it, you're burned out. It's not a dirty word in this business. I'm telling you this as a friend, you need this rest.

  Jack Chester : I can't believe they're doing this! Just because of a stinking fly.

• Jennifer Chester : Did they even say how many rooms they're are?

  Jack Chester : It's three bedrooms and it's on the beach. That's all I know.

  Sandy Chester : Well it was very nice of Hal to find the place.

  Jack Chester : It was very nice of him to tell me that I'm cracking up.

  Sandy Chester : You are not cracking up. You just need this rest.

  Jack Chester : Rest? Didn't we just get back from Hawaii?

  Sandy Chester : Jack, that was our honeymoon.

• Jack Chester : Oh, gee, I forgot my bathing suit. I guess I can't go in the water all summer.

  Sandy Chester : Jack, nobody cares what you look like in a bathing suit.

  [spanks Jack's behind] 

  Jack Chester : That's just it.

  Sandy Chester : I'm going to pick one up for you.

  Jack Chester : Well, I'm not going to wear it. Not until I lose, maybe, 3 or 4 pounds.

  Sandy Chester : I love the way you look in a bathing suit.

  [kiss] 

  Jack Chester : My mother was right, you're twisted.

  Sandy Chester : Mmm-hmm.

• Jack Chester : I'd take those over a power tool any day.

  Vicki : Do they look like real breasts to you?

  [does a shimmy] 

  Jack Chester : Well, you fooled me!

  Vicki : You don't think they're too big?

  Jack Chester : No! No, no, no, no.

• Jack Chester : Your wrong. You're wrong, you're wrong, you're wrong!

  Scully : I'm trying to tell you that as a fighter, pound for pound, my boy, Jimmy Cagney, will disintegrate your Sylvester Stallone. He'll knock his block off!

  Jack Chester : In a street fight, maybe. I give you that. But, not in a movie!

• Al Pellet : You couldn't beat my dinghy.

  Jack Chester : Really?

  Al Pellet : Really.

• Sandy Chester : Jack, you spend all of your time with Scully. What do the two of you do all day?

  Jack Chester : Dance.

• Jack Chester : [everybody is walking by the window in the Chester's house]  Excuse me! Why are you people going through here

  [a fat man belches and points to a sign that says "Public Beach Access"] 

  Jack Chester : Oh perfect.

  [to the crowds] 

  Jack Chester : Come on thru. I'm Joe Public, welcome to my beach.

• Jack Chester : Your wife's on my Wham-O.

• Jack Chester : Where do you think you're going? This isn't a nude beach.

  Jennifer Chester : Oh, Daddy!

  Jack Chester : Who do you think you are? Lolita?

• Vicki : I just made some fresh lemonade. Why don't you come on over and have some?

  Jack Chester : Oh, no.

  Vicki : Oh, come on!

  Jack Chester : No. I wouldn't want to impose.

  Vicki : Impose! What are neighbors for? Come on.