The Perils of Gwendoline in the Land of the Yik Yak (1984)

Brent Huff: Willard

Photos 

Quotes 

• Willard : [Willard, Beth and Gwendoline are tied up at the Cheops's encampment]  Gwendoline, have you ever made love?

  Gwendoline : No.

  Willard : I can't let you die without making love. Here, move as close as you can.

  [They can't reach each other. Willard picks up a straw with his teeth and begins gently poking Gwendoline's face with it] 

• Willard : Look, if I was a butterfly and I lived here, and somebody tried to take me to London, I'd break their face.

• Willard : [after the noxious cloud storm, they're all covered with desert sand]  Hey, you guys okay? You're not dead or anything?

• Gwendoline : [Gwendoline and Willard are grappling over a precipice]  Go on, let me fall! But it'll be your name I scream on the way down.

  Willard : What?

  Gwendoline : That's right, I belong to you body and soul.

  [She falls] 

  Willard : Wait, Gwendoline, I don't say that kind of thing! No! Gwendoline, I love you!

  Gwendoline : [She is squatting on an outcrop, smiling]  I hope that was sincere!

• Willard : Feel like dying?

  Gwendoline : When I'm close to you, I feel safe!

  Willard : Well, that's funny. When I'm with you, I feel just the opposite!

• Gwendoline : How did you know?

  Willard : Call it instinct. I'm infallible.

• Willard : And you'll get nothing from me, you overdressed gargoyle!

• Willard : [as female gladiators duel to the death]  You bastard! Stop this massacre!

  D'Arcy : The Queen's will is the will of the Queen!

  The Queen : Anyway, this is boring. I'm not at all amused.

  D'Arcy : That's your loss. That all you want is violence. That's why they hate you.

• Willard : [in the Cheops's prison. Gwendoline is crying]  It's a little late to be afraid, don't you think?

• Gwendoline : I'll never forget what you've done for us!

  Willard : If I ever see either one of you again, you'll wish I hadn't!

• Willard : [to the boa constrictor draped over the branch]  Get out of my way!

  [pushes it aside] 

  Willard : You're not my type!

  Beth : Is that a boa?

  Willard : [dripping with sarcasm]  No. It's a goldfish.

  Beth : [as she walks past the dangling snake]  Ooh.

• Gwendoline : Haven't you ever been in love with anyone before?

  Willard : Yes. With every woman in the world, except you. No one tells me the way to live my life. I live my life the way I choose.

  Gwendoline : I'm not asking you to change.

• Willard : [they're still tagging him, and he sighs]  What did I tell you?

  Gwendoline : My father's in danger.

  Willard : With a daughter like you, I'm not surprised. Know how to swim?

  Gwendoline : No...

  Willard : Start learning!

  [tosses her into the ocean] 

• Willard : [to the Queen, who revealed D'Arcy isn't able to be a stud]  Give me all your women, and tomorrow you will be overpopulated!

  D'Arcy : Don't boast about it, young man. Because in your place, I'd prefer to be in mine.

• Gwendoline : [all three of them lying hogtied]  Willard? Will you forgive me?

  Willard : Oh, ask me anything, but don't ask me that. I don't wanna sleep badly my last night on earth!